Yakufanyikia haya,jua wewe ni peasant

  1. Instead of a home theatre, you have a Sayona or Ampex or some Chinese-made woofer, or your TV has been hissing with ‘mvua mvua’ since the government switched analogue transmission.
  2. You ever carried fried maize flour to school for lack of a better alternative. This semi processed busaa was to be soaked in water and drank as other students enjoyed juice. Now you know why some of us successfully failed…we were simply drunk in class!
  3. At some point in your life you sliced
    ugali then roasted into make-believe bread since you couldn’t afford a real loaf.
  4. None of your neighbours invites you for a harambee (because you never have any cash to contribute), graduation party (because you look like no one from your clan has ever graduated), weddings (because your children don’t look like they will ever marry) etc.
    You also never get invited because gorge yourself with food and eat as if in a competition, in addition to bringing your entire family to the party, who clear anything edible in a matter of seconds like a locust invasion.
  5. When you have a headache, instead of buying a painkiller, you opt for chai
    mandazi because the headache will take care of itself.
  6. You have used more wild twigs, leaves, maize cobs and stones than tissue paper to wipe your behind after a long drop.
  7. You never had underwear in high school!
  8. You fried sugar sugar into a toffee in the absence of tea leaves.
  9. You love reggae music. The well-off in society prefer rock and jazz.
  10. Lunch was a rumour every time you came back from school and you were forced to raid the guava tree to keep the hunger pangs at bay.
  11. There are more pigs than any other livestock or pets in your neighbourhood. Pigs signify poverty, unlike geese that can only survive with the moneyed.
  12. You are always the first to be suspected whenever something disappears!
  13. Your relatives have been accused of practising witchcraft.
  14. You are already approaching retirement even before getting a job!

True apart from no. 9. You will be surprised how many rich men will dissaprove


Hata summary hatutaki.

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some of us passed through those to own the beemers and the mbulotis and have the Magazine cover look wives they know have.

hata our very own @Mundu Mulosi brewed changaa for his school fees, drank busaa for his lunch lakini saa hizi he lives a better life


No.9 is outrightly false…

:slight_smile: :slight_smile: (: :slight_smile: :slight_smile: (:

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That Life!.. We can’t quit living!

… Till the hour come!

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number 9 tumekataa…

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You copy pasted everything but thot you would spice it up with nmbr 9…am not saying am th

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Boboshanties up in arms on no.9. @Jergen hata wewe?

io #2 imenichekesha sana

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Hata mtu apende jazz leo mpaka kesho and every day thereafter, haitamfanya akuwe billionaire


Birrionea tunasikiza classical music na hatusumbui

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Ziko wapi

  1. kuweka mattress kwa floor,
  2. kulala kwa nyumba haina curtains aka @Rene Descartes
  3. kula bread na maziwa for lunch/supper
  4. Kula breakfast just before lunch ndio usikue na njaa during lunch time

Hehe… if you insist

no.9 is a no.

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Sawa peasant

Sweep hizo classics with this one .


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5.Kuishi 6th floor pale paipu.