This might take a while to Digest But this is the story of my life;
20 years old @Ka-Buda impregnates a 30+ year old MILF - Didnt take the news very well,denied being the father etc. and she had an abortion.- NOT GOOD.
Mid Twenties and @Ka-Buda gets a few "girlfriends " pregnant But they all have "miscarriages " -9or so they say) once they discover @Ka-Buda wasnt looking to setttle down. One of them was 43 for Crying out loud …and i was only 24!..
30 yearss old- @Ka-Buda has his first “planned” child with some Kenyan Momo who i thought was “the-one!”.; She had other Plans - the calculating Cow!
30+ years and my First Trusted Girlfriend who i was to later marry tells me she is pregnant after a few months of “trying”. The most Romantic thing as well… she asks me to rub her back as she has a Bath and as we get all “lovey-dovey” she pulls out this Pregnancy test thingy and it has two shades of blue on it… We had almost given up hope and as i continued to tenderly rub her back as she sat in the Bath-tub i couldn`t help but get so Emotional i remember we held each other and cried for hours mpaka the water in the bathtub got cold.
2 weeks ago. - I am pushing 40 for Crying out loud and this “chips funga” from Ghana that i had managed to “keep” for a week tells me that she thinks that she is Pregnant…
I am old enough to know better than to Deny the Alleged Pregnancy; But its the last thing i need from a woman i just met and just when i am recovering from a Divorce.
I quickly rush to the chemists for a Pregnancy Kit - One of those that tells you exactly How many weeks gone you are. - Shame they Can`t tell you who the Real Father is!.. kikikikikii…
Thankfully ,she was Not paged!..
So,; My Brother; Where do you Fall Among the Above Predicaments,Ndiyo tuweze kukusaidia?..
Was in my twenties when two women who I was dfing told me they were paged almost simultaneously. That was the time I knew that Marie Stopes was not a brand of biscuits… But that was not the big point. Both were married n each had a son. Today those sons are both in class six.
Yes,I have kept in touch with both. The ferking was that good.
In my thirties she got pregnant n tagged me along to the hospital. The stupid doc spoiled what was to be a surprise when he congratulated me for being a prospective father…kwa reception mbele ya hao wamama waja wazito wote. Wished the earth would swallow me. The stupid should have died too.
My advice: Face it like the man you were when dry frying her hadi kwa mkia.
Was in ku exact place sz39 having the wenesday worship when suddenly my sagem rung,my ex was calling ,i excused myself from my chick went outside,the ex shouted “niko na ball yako!” shakingly I told her haiwezekani and with my legs shaking I dashed to student center ,took naps,called her and confidently told her “endazaa leta mtoto na utembee” . Later I learnt it was her ploy for trying to get us back together.
1st my uni gf got pregnant during the final year. Being a “gentleman” i was, i told her not to worry but that wasn’t on her mind. Few weeks down the line, i heard of something like " sweetheart niko marie stopes am not feeling well", only to realise shit got real.
2nd, 24years old, get into this job, dry fried the 33 yr old desperate receptionist. She told me she just wanted to trap me in her life since she was getting old. Da faq.
In between that period, boss was making silly wifes was making advances towards this young aspiring fisi. Immediately after receptionist broke the news, weeks later boss’s wyfe come smiling she was pregnant. I resigned following month.
3rd. This kisii x was sooo much obsessed with me that she could download whatsapp/faceFacebook pics and have on her profile. I got tired with her weird behaviour n told her off. Acha tu, missed me with a knife, Wailing loudly in kikisii, i had to take cover.i went underground for like 3 months when she resurfaced with she was pregnant. I could hear involuntary fart bubbles escaping, weak legs, cold etc. I managed to cool off, told her to keep pregnancy and once the kid was born i was to have custody.