what is your most embarassing moment na mtu umefeel ama kitu crazy umedo juu ya love au sex

so nikiwa second year there was this fly mama. yaani wale wa rangi ya thao kama anerlisa mungai. i had a crash on the chic. wah nakwambia haga ilikuwa one and a half. sura wacha tu huyo aliumbwa siku ya nane…then alikuwa anado i stuff madame hudo unafunga kibandana then unavaa aviator shades wacha tu… so mafisi kama kawa walikuwa wamejaribu though mi sikutry juu department ya lugha bado ilikuwa down. so ilikuwa one thursday… nlikuwa nimelala late nikiwatch marathon ya series…nikaamka 09;48 na lesson iliwa 10. singeskip daro juu huyo mode hakuwa anapeana notes so unaandika wat unaskia then unakuta mabackbenchers wote wamefloat considering mabeste wangu ka wote walikuwa uko…so nimetoka mbio toka kahawa hadi k.u chap chap hadi daro…nikaingia kama nimekunja sura kama mandazi then alas nikapata empty seat uko nyuma…hehe then alikuwa amekaa next…haha so nikaketi unfortunately nikaanza kusweat ka fuck juu ya kutembea mbio toka gate na io jua ya njanuary…wai balaa tupu…nikacheck mfuko nikakuta sina biro nilisahau…so niko like “una pen mbili” nikaona ameharibu sura…nikakumbuka ata sikuwa nimebrush meno nikitoka juu ya haraka saa izo naomba tuu sweat ikauke haraka…then worst of all sikuwa naelewa kenye mode anasema…but siwezi mkaribia niangalie book yake ameandika nini juu nanuka sweat na mdomo…that was the longest one-hour ever…nilichomoka apo mbio aftar lesson…and thats how my idea of dating my crush was crashed.
whats yours?


I drove from Nairobi to Busia at Night since a prospect pussy had finally become available something that I had not even planned by that day at 12 noon

I can smell the stinky smell from this post.Si uhame KM?

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I still laugh when I remember the idiot who stole a whole vase with flowers to take to his campus crush while drunk as ferk. That storo was damn hilarious.


smdh hotbed of chest-thumping as usual! Niggas about to walk in here telling lies!


Múthúri tumalizie hii hekaya

:D:D:DNafatities relax…

It was here a few weeks ago, can’t remember who posted it though.

Some could be true. Guys can do dumb things or break down before gorgeous Chiquitas.

so i have this crush in high school, a classmate… hot like the flames of hell…all i could do was ogle and never had the guts to say a word to her…one look from her and i went mute…never understood why or how that happened…years went by and finally i managed to get her attention on the leavers bash…like some sort of miracle we bonded and i actually convinced her to accompany me to a friend’s house after the bash, i had saved enough for a mzinga and my friend excused himself…enyewe hii story ya kuomba ikuss ni stress but somehow after what seemed like an eternity and with the help of booze she gave in.I was a virgin and seriously clueless on matters sex…heavy petting mdogo mdogo…kiss… Then hwaa i jump ontop of the lass eyes red,heart thumping…walalala…naingia the wrong hole pumping like a maniac…sio hapoo!..next try wrong whole again…toka juu yangu kama huwezi thundered the frustrated lass…angry i turn he r around and go doggy…sema pussy kua kubwa! I felt like i was ringing a bell mwagaad what seemed like a bucket full and i finally gave up! The look she gave me as she left threw daggers aimed straight to my heart…i never saw her ever again and i hope i never do… It took me a year to get over that… Sorry Nefertities nothing was worth chest thumping there

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we were working together, she fell and i saw manywele ,yaani she had not shaved and she was wearing a thong, i was disgusted yangu yote, nilimwambia ashave akaleta shida… end of crush.

Nilikamua dem wa 14 years

[SIZE=6]paedophile alert (someone please call 911)[/SIZE]


Where’s Keriako Tobiko when you need him most?

Damn right, am here for the comments too…

Nakumbuka way back nikiwa high school nilipea waitress fulani tip anichukulie namba ya mwenzake. Sijui ni wivu ama nini, she did get me number alright but she told my target my intentions. Sato imefika nimeenda kadate alafu naona kila kitu inaflow then dem anaangusha misile. Needless to say I lost my “kiswahili”.

@Nefertities this is not a boast. Its horniness and stupidity of the highest level.
So there was this gal I had met thru a friend.Nikamfeel akanifeel. But hakuachilia. So in the course of our interaction she lets out her birthday was a few days and if I cared to show up,there would be an after bash in her house. There are no prizes for guessing who was the only invitee…
So horny me can not wait for the Friday to arrive. Oh I forgot to mention that she used to work in Kericho while I worked in Nakuru. Thursday night,my drunken horny self tells me that I can travel to Kericho and surprise her. Long story short,the bus I got at one am had an accident at a place called Kapkatunga. Had to call her to come for me.
I never got to get jiggy that weekend,the pain was too much. I neither took any alcohol,was on meds.
I still consider that among the most stupid things I have done coz of ikus…

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Naweka yangu weekend.

[SIZE=4]Which missile was this? [/SIZE]

would you like your crush to realize you were not bold enough to ask for her number?