What happens after marriage?!??

I dont know what happens when people get married or start living together(What is the difference btw).When dating, bae will behave very well ,His/her manners are up there.When eating they will close their mouths ,eat slowly occasionally wiping the corners of the mouth with serviettes(even when you are only the two of you).They will even leave some meat on the bone,some food and a waru.When sneezing they will close their mouths and suppress a sneeze and say :“excuse me”.When someone hears to fart ,they will excuse themselves and go a secluded place,fart to their satisfaction and return .They make sure the smell is finished kapsaa ,Words like excuse me would their daily song.Let you people now get married or live together warefa you want to call it ,wololo all caution is thrown to the dogs.Bae will now be eating fast occasionally licking a finger or two.They will not be leaving meat on the bone but suck out bone marrow out of the bones like Hiroshima is about to be bombed.Finish all the food ,drink some water and belch out loudly and say “ahhhhhhhh” .When sneezing they will shake like someone having seizures and then remove some “achooooooooo” in succession louder than bukusu drums during a circumcision ceremony.They will shamelessly wipe out mucus with your Tshirt and throw it in the laundry basket.When hearing to fart bae will release some loud atomic pieces of fart smelling so bad jeez !.They will look at you, smile and lie “Ile maharagwe ya jana ni kama iriniharibu tumbo” you will nod in agreement and try to vumilia but noo too much ,you go get fresh air and come back.When asking for something or asking to pass you will just see them pass without saying “excuse me” you will just hear someone pushing you with their butt as you strugle to breath as their butt is all over your face.Thats why sometimes you sit there look at bae and shake your head and ask what happened to this little pretty human being

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:eek::eek::eek:
@introvert

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Si utakanyangwa na TATA hadi atoms zipotee.

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I will have doubts if she happens to be very refined on the first date sitaki surprises after marriage.

Non-issues,you are too young to get married.

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:eek::smiley:
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Hii midterm itaisha lini?

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That’s why you should fight against familiarity, Dame / Wife asiwahi kuzoea!

“But Bangaiza how do I do that?” By being unpredictable! She should never be able to predict you & your re/actions (most of the time)! “So Bangaiza I make my woman feel like she walking around egg shells?” NO! I mean do things out of routine, make comments out of routine and react differently sometimes! Shida with us guys we like routine; home-work-pub-home, home-work-gym-home, home-job-class-home,home-home ukifika home same things change clothes hit the sofa!

Do things out of character, surprise her once in a while, start unnecessary arguments just to get some tension going, make small issues big and some times big transections small! Familarity breeds contempt I think it was said by a woman!

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:eek::D:D:D:D Osungu melemea

a talker here once said you should pee in the bed once in a while to assert dominance within the four walls just like a wild animal :D:D

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@introvert panda yemehe faster mjamaa ameua kizungu

:eek::eek: That’s way too extreme as with any ‘philosophy’ its good to find a middle ground

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Story of my life… …
Daigua guthuria. …

hehee…kama ile ya mbwa ya kumark territory…ryt?:D:D

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kabisaa, anatoka hapo anakupikia breakfast ya kifalme :D:D

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".When someone hears to fart ,they will excuse themselves and go a secluded place,fart to their satisfaction and return .They make sure the smell is finished kapsaa.
Hapa umenimaliza. Ata Kama ni kutafuta likes bana…

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That is trivial stuff. There are big bombs to deal with. like boss fuckin your wife without cd and cumming inside.

hapa kuna mtu ametombewa bibi, leta hekaya boss.

Sina hekaya. lakini since my girl is getting employed for the first time I have such worries which are of course legitimate. Forget little concerns like your woman taking a dump loudly before bedtime.

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For once Bangaiza I agree with you 100%.Long time ago I used to act all lovey dovey, carry treats home every evening till nikaona mwanamke ameanza mazoeano. If I went with this anapindua mapua akiuliza ‘mbona sasa umeleta hii’.I changed my modus operandi, I became unpredictable. She doesn’t know what mood I will be in when I get home and since she doesn’t want to risk, she walks like she’s on eggshells. Meanwhile I alternate between being good when she’s expecting I will be in a foul mood. And being bad wherever she’s expecting I will be in a fine mood. That way, balance is restored in my birrionaire abode.
Usiwahi wacha mwanamke akusome. You will cry in the toilet.

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