The Metamorphosis of the Old-school Kenyan man`s sex life

  1. 7-9 years of age ; Discover your sexuality when you play “cha baba na cha mama” and even attempt to “guzisha” but you are not quite sure where it is supposed to go.

  2. 10 - 15 years old ; Dinya your own mboch and proceed to dinya all the mboches in the neighbourhood

  3. 15- 18 years old ; Continue dinyaring all the neighbourhood mboches and discover girls your own age who are also horny as hell but are too scared to loose their virginity.

  4. 18-21 years old: Shag your first real girlfriend who you meet at college ama uni and are convinced is the future wife and even introduce her to your relatives if not your parents.- it won`t last,believe me!

  5. 21- 28 years old ; Marry some random woman who you met at work because you have impregnated her and everybody tells you its the right thing to do.

  6. 28- 35 years old ; Younger girls at work are finding you more attractive juu you are the boss or you are in charge in some capacity - Sema kumanga trainees!

  7. 35- 40 years old; Your wife knows what you have been up to and heshima between you and her is gone and you even think she is shagging her boss as well as her ex.You want to divorce her but you have kids and the Pastor at church and the parents from both sides think you can get through this hard time.(thats what they said anyway; the last time the wifey ran back to her parents after a massive fight)

  8. 40 -Forever ; You are just some miserable bastard unhappy at home and sexually seeking cheap thrills from the bar-maids and pokos in your local pub where you spend most of your time.

  9. Forever - Eternity. You are discovered dead in a backstreet Lodging, naked and foaming at the mouth because you overdosed on the fake viagra or uliwekewa mchele.


I’m i the only guy who missed out on the mboch phase?


Maybe you`re Not old-school. You have to be atleast Thate-fae to relate to this.

10)Explain to your Maker why you had no respect for your body or tried self constraint …lucky are those who have no Creator as they believe they came from atoms or the wind :D:D…as they shall not grind their teeth


10. Will have rendered me a turd in front of my maker. . that’s it, I quit.

not really, a good number of my peers have. Guess i was too sensitive about it leaking out.

:D:D:D…came from atoms or the wind…

Luckie r those wu had mboches to shag…some of us were brought up in a strict environment wea even touching ua playmate by mistake wud land u a through beating

Not applicable to everyone though.

9,CouchP take note. Those younglings you post about here will lead you to this.

Metamorphosis of a girl.
11 - early 20s…Keep away from boys
Late 20s onwards…When are you getting married?


I also didnt touch any mboches at all…and this was in ngummo.

I was in boarding school from class four so I might have missed the mboch part but most of my peers were initiated in that manner

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Number 4 is on point for me, I once introduced a chick to my mum as my wife to be only for we break up a week later

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Chamama cha baba…we used to guzisha at 4 years immidiately after kuingia nusery - kalongo ndio ilikuwa game… Na sai hiyo tunaguzisha tudem tuko three years…By age 7 (thats class three), I was shagging classmates. Whats with the late blooming??

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i introduced like 3 paka mathe akadai niache upoko…kumangana 1st time ni uni, soo mamboch nilihata. i think nitawamanga at 50s


Luo saying: A bull dies with grass in its mouth.

EEEEEEEEEEEW! Is there an “unlike” button? Also, where is CPS in Kenya?And where was your goddamn mother when you was flailing your flaccid penis’ around small girls?

I see so many questionable comments! side eye

@Nefertities your name, nice :cool::cool:

How is your metamorphosis?