The comedy that’s the eulogy

So everyone in Kenya who dies- especially the mighty- is always a ‘saint?’

You will not be surprised if an MP dies in the hands of a mpango wa kando(due to Viagra overdose) and everyone eulogises him as a faithful, loving husband. Phew!

Or a leader who was well known for corrupt deals is eulogised as a man of integrity.

Even worse, you’ve seen a family member who was despised and even hated by other family members being eulogised thus “ we loved you but God loves you most’ yet when he was alive, the said family members would have preferred to meet a hungry hyena than meet him.

A k street prostitute will be eulogised as a ‘hardworking woman who always respected herself’ ha ha ha !

It’s for this reason that if I attend a funeral, I only read the sections on education, marriage, kids, place of work and nothing more. I have no time to read about ‘oh, he was the best church leader that we had’. I am aware than no human being can understand the heart of another person. Leave judgement to God.

Well, it’s not customary to speak ill of the dead. In that case, if you were a thief, instead of fooling people how good you were, the best I can do is to remain silent. I believe in the saying ‘we have not come to praise Caesar ; we have come to bury him’

Another thing quite unrelated here: have you ever noticed that some women become better looking, dress nicely and, generally, are more jovial upon the death of their husbands? Of course the hood gossipers now say ‘ it’s better that that **** of a husband died; look how great she looks now after the death of that drunkard’.

Watch out! Don’t mistreat your wife



Thank God I won’t have a memorial service when I die,15 minutes and my burial is over.

hehehe, hiyo paragraph ya mwisho ni ukweli tupu!

By insuring our policemen i think the govt literally put the lives of our (not so)good cops in danger.

@PewterShmit, with about 10 million in insurance cover, i think some women married to policemen wouldnt mind their husbands dying ‘in the line of duty’.

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