This is inspired by the buffoonery expressed here: http://bit.ly/2sNKNJN
Kudos @amun for surviving the hellish sting!
Once upon a time, in primary school, there was this bully called Gathii. In case you’re wondering, it was a polling station and not a group of schools. That’s why… I still vote there btw.
This guy. He was tall, dark and almost a monster. Kind of and… back then. Today we talk like men when we meet. Somehow he never evolved beyond the village we grew up in but he is making do.
Once Saturday afternoon, we were heading home after a social welfare programme (remember Plan International, Compassion, Child Fund etc programmes?) we had every Sato and he got into his monkey biz. Being tall, he could do all kinds of things like taking your stuff and stressing you for it. Keep jumping but you’ll never get it kinda thing…
So, this day I decided to teach him a lesson by never ever having to fight for MY stuff or any other kind of psychological torture, again. He was ahead of me in a group of other boys and I got into a bush and carefully selected the thabai (Kikuyu name for stinging nettle) I’d use for my onslaught if he attacked.
He should have known better but just like Trump, he though his plans were fabulous. This time, we were to prove if it was so…
He planned to attack and I warned that I would beat him up with the thabai but he said I couldn’t. My size was a disadvantage then since I went to school young. I also was swift so the odds weren’t that badly off stucked against me.
Big mistake for Gathii. When he refused to heed the warning, he lunged at me and instinctively I slapped his face twice with the broad leaves (the thabai would put to shame what is around today). He was shocked and anticipating what would happen, he started blowing his nose to get ready to deal with the stinging…
The other boys were surprised that their shining star was covered in mucous and massaging his face rabidly but it was a lesson well learned.
To cut a long story short, Gathii never attacked me again and neither did any other boy. To this day…
