So You wanna be a Christian??

Here ls what you need to know…

Mary had a baby but she was still a virgin.

Jesus was the baby but he was his father and his son.
Jesus was born in Bethlehem but he was from Nazareth

and remember he didn’t speak Hebrew, he spoke Aramaic.

Paul is Saul and Simon is Peter. The devil is an angel and a snake that talks.
Jesus lived, died and now he lives. He was here but left and will be back aga
There is one God but they are three, the father, the son and the Holy Ghost.
God freed the slaves but only exactly when the Pharaoh freed them.

God was a Jew and was killed by Jews but not by Jews, for playing God
and so that made him Christian and God to everyone but the Jews.
Jesus was not here to change the law but ended most of them.
Wine is blood and bread is flesh.

A fisherman catches men and not fish.

A fish is not meat and we cannot eat meat on Friday so we eat fish
with bread which is flesh but not meat…

The first Christian was Jew, he was crucified for the Jews by Romans
says a Roman Christian who was a Jew.

Romans killed Jews and Christians until they began worshiping a Jew,
became Christian and killed more Jews.

God made everyone but he is Christian and Jews are his chosen people.




Ujinga pia ni kipawa.

SomeNi bibilia acheni ubaguzi

There is a hierarchy in the triune Godhead the father is the senior most,then the Son and the holy spirit comes last,while it’s preached that the partners in this Godhead are equal. Mary was an exceptional woman she carried God in her womb,just wondering when she was pregnant did she pray to the God in her stomach? Then again Jesus used to eat food,nature must have taken it’s course and he had to visit the toilet… Can you imagine a God taking a shit??? God forbid!! Absurdity of the highest order.

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hahaha…Jews effectively killed an omnipresent god. The new testament is about some sect leader kama maina jenga offending the authorities. similarities between the christ and maina njenga is striking.

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Jesus Christ has never been God.
The Trinity is a roman catholic creation it is not in the holy Scripture.

So what holy scripture do you use?

The Bible which is widely available.

Its essentiallly a creation of roman catholicism.

Its absolute absurdity that god has to shit. However, shitting isnt bad in any way. Set aside your social conditioning. Note that mohammedans also claim that jesus was concieved by a decree of god.

People really follow religions blindly. Despite the animosity between christians and muslims, and despite muslims embarking on a mission to kill everyone on earth, quran give more credit to jesus than the bible does. Quran says that jesus was sucked up into heaven rather than have to go through humiliating death by crucifixion. Weird enough quran says that Jesus was the only prophet who could heal and raise the dead(it does not claim that any other prophet could do that). All this murdering and fighting is because of two uneducated(in the modern sense) ancient cult leaders.

And if christians think jesus returns only for them, he also returns for muslims(quran claims so) much in the same way.

The Bible is not roman creation.
Infact romans considered Christianity to be a heresy.

God the Father, the Son and Holy Spirit simply means this; the Father as the source of everything, the Son as what is manifest already (what we can see) and the Holy Spirit being the quality/consciousness behind everything. In short it refers to the Source, the Manifest and Unmanifest

We shall forever try to interpret what we propose ourselves(didn’t the trinity idea get more support as a result of the Nicea council?). We complicate matters then try to deliberate upon them. Maybe we should just leave such matters alone and believe what we wanna.

Read a little more. You are talking of first and second century Roman empire where the likes of Nero were Antichristian…After Constantine converted to christianity, the roman empire started accepting christianity and later became the Holy Roman Empire with catholicism being the sole accepted doctrine. Read “Inquisition” too. The Holy Roman Empire, and Roman Catholic church came up with the modern bible as you know it. Protestants took it and edited it. Protestants split from the Roman Catholic church, they havent been always there. The modern church and the spread of christianity is the making of the Roman empire , and without it, christianity would have remained a small religion with very many factions with disagreeing views.
The original books of the bible were nothing like the modern bible, and everyone was reading their script. while some even believed in John others believed in jesus, others were reading peter’s writings and others pauls writing, thomas’ writings , and so on. There so many other writings that were not accepted as legitimate for political reasons.

taking Christianity at face value ei? How about the Holy spirit that each ‘expert interpreter’ has conveniently failed to mention as the guide to interpretation? If I told you today, “on this stone, there are words of great meaning. However, you need
these pair of glasses to see/read them” Then you went ahead, took the stone and stared at it without the glasses, complained that It doesn’t make sense. That all you see are tiny grooves and bumps. It’s just like any other rock. How do you suppose I answer you?

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What spirit. We dont believe in fuckin spirits in the world of reason. We read what is written, and if its bullshit we dont call on any spirit. It is very covenient for some muthafacka to say that no one can understand this book because the interpreter is a spirit. Mbona that spirit doesnt come here and read it out for us right now. ama kazi yake ni gani?


Kumbe huyu ni mkristo na he keeps denying.

'What glasses. I don’t need no glasses when I can see the rock just fine. ’