Kuna thread fulani about family get-togethers and I couldn’t help but notice mashamba ilifanya watu wakosane, as expected. Most of you guys admitted to not having get-togethers for a long time.
I also noticed that there are some younger and naive guys who still think their family will support them “100% without questions and judgment” :D:D:D
I’m going to give my own view on this from personal experience and from observing members of my extended family and other extended families I know.
The relationship between family members usually starts off tight. Then the kids grow into adults and start earning. That’s when siblings and cousins start to learn each other’s true nature. Between 25 and 35 (youth age bracket), there is immense “character development” as people learn the limits of their relationship. Most people are shocked to discover that every relationship with close relatives has limits and some limits are very low. The guy above who thinks that he has 100% support with zero inhibitions might discover that the support is actually 15% with lots of conditions when he tests those relationships :D:D. Usually this is when one experiences a rough patch like job loss. A guy like @magreb must have gone through some serious character development.
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Next stage ni 35+ when everyone has kids. Kuanzia hapo kuendelea the relationships get more distant as economic divides widen. You will notice that your uncles and aunts tend to be closer to those who are in their socioeconomic status. Muchatha group one side, Karen and Ridgeways group the other side. Kids align themselves like that too but to a lesser degree because kids are mostly innocent.
By 50, the differences will be like night and day. The relationships have been tested to their elastic limits, and people have either swam or sank. The winners and losers are evident and winners no longer give a fk about losers. When there is a family gathering, the Karen gang will arrive, do their thing, and then leave the villagers in a cloud of dust with their guzzlers with zero chills :D:D. That’s when you find two siblings living totally different lifestyles bila kuchanuana. We all have uncles and aunts whose lives are like night and day despite being siblings and you wonder what happened.
The only problem is as you grow they start seeing you as competition. They will assume you have money since you live in certain neighbourhoods and when you are unable to help all of them because of some circumstances unaitwa maringo or wivu mchoyo e.t.c.
By 50… @Mwaniks789 atakua na old fag with various deadly diseases. Atakua amefilisika mpaka no one will want anything to do with him. Listen to me and change your ways ama utakufa usahaulike. JINGA SANA.
This is very true,most family hate peasants with a passion followed by single mothers, divorcees , single ladies academic dwarf s,drug users and [SIZE=1]bachelor’s[/SIZE]
Very true, some years ago while I was still in school mimi nilikuwa nakula tu vitabu pale campo and minding my business. My cousins then were in school and doing business part-time. They were being praised as “watu wamefunguka akili” hadi my old man made me feel like mimi ni mtu bonoko. First forward milango zilifunguka na saa hii nanukisha kitunguu, all of a sudden I have become a threat to everyone. Funny enough kuna relatives who now wants to be close, huwa nawapea number but once nimefika kanairo nalenga hizo calls mbaya sana.
Mimi huwa natuma pesa kwa wazazi na grandis, wengine tukutane jehanamu. I give zero fcuks
And quite understandable. If you have two farmers one works hard becomes successful while the other one is lazy, do you expect the hardworking one to be feeding & giving money to the other one.
Many people have a tendency of looking at people’s salaries and forgetting the hardwork and sacrifice those guys had to put to reach where they are. According to them, those guys should be giving them a fraction of their money.
And these guys its not like they were never given any chance. They were educated, but wasted their time chasing skirts, drinking, partying etc
True. There is a difference between enabling and feeding. Nobody should expect to be fed by relatives.
In your example about 2 farmers, if they are relatives, you would expect the successful one to share ideas, not money. I have seen people who are related, do the same business, but the successful one can’t share ideas. You will be surprised.
When I was in uni, a relative tried to enroll me in these multi-level marketing garbage. Keep in mind that I had asked him anichanue about some other profitable business he was doing lakini hiyo alilenga kabisaa. He only wanted to enrol me in that scheme instead of introducing me to the other hustle alikuwa ananukisha nayo kitunguu.