Credit: Wanja Kavengi
Kioko is a cockerel who mounts every hen.
He chases them until he gets them, then climbs on them and ejaculates in two seconds. Kioko fucks every woman he can, and when he runs out of women to fuck he fucks them again. The ladies warn each other about him.
“Don’t let his looks fool you,” they say to each other.
“He is a whore. He will not only hunt you but also your sister, your mother and your friend.”
Many who thought they were in a relationship with him have been heartbroken and many more he has sired with and abandoned.
“Kioko is a hypocrite,” they discuss.
“He will call you a slut after fucking you. He’ll say you are easy. But don’t fall for it. He is the easy one, he is the slut. You don’t have to do or say anything for him to drop his pants for you.”
Kioko goes to social events to find women. He uses the little money he doesn’t have to buy them alcoholic drinks expecting them to thank him with sex. When they don’t, he insults them and says women are users.
“Why accept my drink if you won’t sleep with me?” he asks.
“Was the drink meant to arouse me?” she asks.
He tries to win them over with cheap gifts and small monetary tokens then calls them gold-diggers when they don’t reciprocate his “love.”
Kioko is getting old and his youth is fading away. No one wants him. They say his “mileage” is high, his “body count” is a long number, he is “used goods”.
While his peers built foundations for their futures he wasted his best years whoring, drinking alcohol and smoking shisha and weed, and now that he’s “damaged goods”, he is looking to settle down.
But who will marry him?
He is single, unmarried and bitter, and has strong, negative opinions about women.
Kioko talks smack about women’s bodies, their falling breasts and fat stomachs.
He says the extra layers of fat around their abdomens look hideous, yet he, too, has extra layers of fat around his abdomen that look hideous.
He says they should exercise, flatten their stomachs and reduce their waistlines to look more appealing, yet he looks like he needs the exercise more. He is the one who needs that corset and that packet of slimming tea.
Kioko calls himself “boy child” and to some extent the nickname is fitting for he behaves like a child. He claims women are emotional creatures and can’t be trusted with serious or important things but he is more emotional.
He throws an outrageous, childish tantrum when a thing as small as a contrary opinion is presented to him. He goes ballistic when he hears a woman say she doesn’t cook or clean. He insults a woman when she ignores his sleazy, cat calls and whistles.
He ridicules women for crying when watching their favourite shows yet he cries hysterically when his favourite football team loses. He is angry when a woman refuses his advances after buying her a beer. He is upset and jealous when a woman is financially and professionally successful and living a good life. He says she fucked her way to the top.
He says it must be a man financing her lifestyle. Women are emotional? Women are irrational? Well, you haven’t met Kioko.
Kioko says he is unmarried, not because no woman wants him, but because no woman is “wife material” enough for him. He prefers naïve women from the countryside who haven’t been soiled by modernity, meek, subservient women who don’t wear make-up or wigs or tight dresses. “Slayqueens” are evil, he swears.
He calls them feminists. He thinks “feminist” is an insult. He calls the other women “kienyeji”. He thinks “kienyeji” is a compliment.
But Kioko is still a whore. He pursues his “kienyeji” women like a full time job, and one by one he has his way with them, leaving some, whom he promised love, heartbroken, and many more with children he never cares for.
Whenever he is asked for child support he finds an online forum to express strong opinions about “single mothers”. He is vehemently against abortion and vasectomies yet he has tens of children he doesn’t acknowledge.
He also feels somehow about condoms.
It’s like eating a sweet with the wrapper on, he says. He has unfriendly and ignorant views about female family planning methods too, and he apparently can identify women who “eat” family planning pills by the way their bodies look.
Yet, when a lass says she’s pregnant for him, he asks her why she wasn’t using any family planning pills. Afterwards, he laments about women using pregnancies to trap men.
In these online forums Kioko has found a loving community of fellow bitter men who enrich each other’s lives through sharing of useful tips on how to be worse men, by hating, despising and punishing women.
He attends dodgy online “workshops” with “teachings” that bear hostile, chauvinistic dogmas in the name of masculine progression intended to shape him into an “alpha male” but it appears he’s being shaped into an asshole.
Kioko doesn’t think for himself.
He let’s other men think for him, decide for him, and tell him what to do. They are like a herd of cattle, in those online forums, cows following other cows.
When Kioko reads this, he will come for me. He will have a few choice words for me. Or a thesis. You don’t have to look very far.
You will find him in the comments section.
Don’t judge an account by its pseudonyms