Captain's Diaries

I started doing business at a very tender age. I rem selling biscuits and icecreams during church service when I was still a Sunday school kid. OK, my mum owned a small kiosk that’s where i used to steal…no…to pick such items…not just picking but taking posession of the items without acknowledging mum. I sold them at a Bob each. I was the sonko among a group of boys that I paid Cinema shows for after the service.
In primary school, the kiosk was still there. That meant I would illegally take possession of pens and excersise books to sell at school. A sinlge pencil went for 5Bob from captain unlike 2bob at other kiosks far away from our school. Speedo, aim and bic pens went for 10bob or 12bob unlike the usual 8bob. U were either to buy from me or go drying. If u tried to sneak out of school to go and buy the cheaper one, as the class monitor i would do what I knew best and that found you face the wrath of Mr, wakamau…our school headmaster. That was like f**king up with my bizz…I even sold Kasuku exercise books. That’s how i started making cash to buy my own cloths aged 8years.
In high school I first sold my big brother’s C.Muturi mathematics book at Kshs 800. Of course I never required the book at that time until third form. Out of the cash I was able to buy a couple of New king James versions required by our syllabus at 150 each and sold them at 400. A brand new one costed like 700. Bought setbooks from the outgoing forthforms and sold at a profit to other students in lower form 3s and potential candidates as we called them. Our school never had a kiosk. How I illicitly smuggled ngumus, weed cakes, pinpops, FHs is a tale for another day.(FH ni zile makali za Frying Horse, ingine ilikuwa Tiger Brandy, KC, KK n so on). Don’t worry I even sold “makorofear”.
During my times in college I saw an opportunity to sell Tees to the many clubs I found there. I started branding different colours for diff clubs. The CUs, YCs, The Rotaracts, among others. There’s this company named Kiboko that makes plain t-shirts at Enterprise rd where I used to buy each at 200bob, brand at 150 and sell at 1k each. Life was good in college coz I lived like PMs kid.
Out of college, job hunting , hustles here and there and into business again. U rem the gas business at Zimmerman that saw me run buncrupt. Kuchengwa, kuibiwa, kunyang’anywa gari na bank, kusota na kufirisika. I went back home… 014 (Hekaya ziko nahuko chini)…I went ahead into farming nikafuga some funny funny birds, chicken, pigs, operated taxi(probox that malysyad with the bank) and later came back in the city, bizna kama kawaida.
Now, all this time I’ve been looking for moneys,trying to fulfil my dreams and actually getting to a point levelled “self actualisation” . Hii level hata Mimi siijui saana but I long for that moment I’ll sit at the middle of the city like Chris Kirubi and look at my uncountable wealth surrounding me from all directions.

The memoir continues shortly

Safi sana…mambo ni kujaribu…alafu kuna watu kazi yao ni kudestroy biz za watu wengine

I’ve seen them all. Even your trustees. Biashara sio mchezo. Hate when someone plays with anyone’s bizz

If you are into reading you might like the following. I understand they are meant of people who are business oriented…

  1. The secret-rhonda byrne
  2. The intelligent investor-benjamin graham
  3. Money master the game-tony robbins
  4. The four hour work week-timothy ferriss
  5. The power of habit-charles duhigg
  6. How to win friends & influence people-dale carnegie
  7. The $100 dollar start-up-chris guillebeau
  8. The 10X rule-grant cardone
  9. Zero to one-peter thiel

Asande sana @Afro . I’ll link up

March 2015.

Now, i had alleviated myself from the pressure and depressions of running buncrupt. Out of farming I had acquired a brand van and stepped back in the city. My family with me (only mrs na mimi, had no kid reason to be explained later), settled behind Mesora in Buru. I set up my bizz, and operated my van very early in the morning ferrying passengers along route 36. You know how hectic it gets to wait for ma3 during rush hours. I wasted no opportunity making sure the short morning trips zimenibuyia ngata to operate my bizz deals throughout the day. But that didn’t last long, for those familiar with the city surbubs, Mesora na Buru police steshon ni mabrothers. That meant operating the illegal PSV business kina @pamba landed on me almost daily. I did quit.

By goodness grace i got a deal with some Sudanese guys taking them from Buru estate to a company in Thika rd. In the morning and later in the eve and the guys paid 3k a day. I would later help Mama take care of the biz we had set up at mesora selling matress, super drums, gas and a few electronics.

Ok… Am that type of a person who puts up a web type of bizz. Within 5 to six months, we had branches around Harmony huko outer ring, K-south, Bangu(kariobangi North) but later closed after it was broken into, a branch near Hamsa, Mtindwa and Umoja innercore. "kila kitu ilikuwa bahari yake". Our rocket shot towards the moon.

But I had one issue with kina pamba. My van had a private insurance cover instead of commercial. It’s the same van I used to ferry my stock shop to shop. This meant I was a fren of state pale Buru statehouse. Bearing in mind the location of different shops i had, hakuna vile I could have dodged away the blue boys. It was a norm kukulwa punch anytime of the day mpaka nikaona hawa watu wamenizoea. One Friday I engaged the Resist Gear nikasumbuka sana. My van was cramped then ikakujiwa na breakdown. The niggers refused nidrive up to the steshon insinuating that hiyo mioto ugo nayo yapesa itaisha gichana. That was an indirect implication of milking my cash dry. Since ilikuwa na mzigo ikatokana bumber. I reciprocated that with an insult. “Taroria ngity ino nimwathukiria ngari na uvici wenyu ava.” (Look you munchys you have destroyed my van working like boys here).
ile design nilishikwa kuingizwa…actually ni kurushwa kwa defender nikama mpira wa ruji. I spent almost 6hrs in an isolated cube ndani. Nkitoka nilikuwa nimevura hata makagary sababu ya kulwa na kunguni. Later ndio OCS (Vaite Fulani Hapo) showed up with full info and asked me to pay cashbill ya 5k tupatane makandara lawcourts Monday. On noticing ni Vaite nikamshow his boys have been milking me the same amount na huko barabarani esp the idiot archepytal belligerent cop that brought me there. Nikamhesabia some other huge amounts I’ve been milked. He promised to fix that.

Later I came to learn the breakdown that towed my van was owned by the same negro. Pleaded with Vaite akaniachilia bure hata. Ookey, sio bure lakini coz he pocketed 3k and I promised to meet him at Club Jamfilter nahapo outer ring Ksouth as we straighten my deals. Tukachafua goat ribs and grabbed one two threes.
I left the steshon and found the guy coming to collect towing fee from Vaite. As the boss waved goodbye i showed the stupid cop the middle finger na kuchomoa gari. Saw the idiot like had plans of hunting me. Vaite became my fren after subsequent meetings at Club Hornbill pale Umo, Club Egesa among others.

After a few weeks the rogue cop had been transferred to Wajir.
…its…tea…time…I’ll be back.

Kumbe wewe ndio ulinituma wajir!

Under cover mission @pamba. Hehe:D:D:D

Maliza hekaya najua saa hii uko sawa

Hata sijuangi nikiwa sawa ama nikiwa down. Life had taught me to adapt in any situation. All in all I appreciate place nimefika

Kijana umepitia mengi ukujaribu kunukisha kitunguu…


November 2015.
Our destiny missile was still rocketing past the skies. We had saved enough that Mr and Mrs captain were planing to either buy an academy school a friend was selling or a kaplot pale bypass. Already there was one at kangundo rd where I was planing to drop a huge apartment for my beloved future family. The place had uncompleted structure that I used to spend with Tabby after kulewa pale kamakis. Those who don’t know Tabby, she’s the receptionist i met sometimes back while selling chicken in their motel. We had a relationship of more than an year. She also serviced me whenever tumekosana na Mrs.

Now Mrs was into the academy thing. I was into that kangundo home, also wanted to upgrade our van or else kaploti Ruai. One day Mrs woke up only to find another brand 3-3 at our parking lot. She was happy and at the same time mad. This is where i tell my fellow men not to follow anything a woman vomits. You know some think with their butt, way up their noses and vormit their stupid ideas out of their mouth. Mostly without thinking about the repercussions.
Mrs decided to pick a large sum of cash and do her own things. I picked the remainder also to do my own tings. In the process we fought and she left to their home with more than 650k. Was left alone to run my kingdom. As usual mwanaume hawes jiachilia kuchapa madryspell. Tabby could visit esp during the weekend and go back to work county 014 very early on Monday morning…

At the onset of Dec, I met a certain guy, with the cash I had stroke a deal and started processing documents za kaploti nahapo Kamakis. I went ahead, did some search and found the piece of land was clean from the ministry of lands. I payed him 750k and promised to fasten nilipe the remaining amount by Jan. I never cared(up to date) to ask where Mrs took her cash. Women are very mean with their monies. I once saw us sleep hungry mum akiwa na pesa ya chama. My dad also gave my sis more pocket money than me, na nikiuliza he used to tell me, don’t ever ask a woman where she took her cash. That taught me never to ask any woman (Mrs included) where she takes her cash.

Things started moving south in Jan 2016. Mrs was abit ill. She suffered a temporary condition that saw her miscarry in 2014. We had therefore resolved to a solution of her not conceiving only to do so after a period of kedo 18months. The issue kept her with lots of pain that saw her spend much cash on medication. It had resurfaced after a complete wait of 20months. And by that time she wasn’t at my place for a reason explained above. Tabby was aware of this and was also 5months paged ready to give birth to a handsome baby boy for this man she shared with Mrs. I loved them in equal measures and planned to build her a home once am done with the Kamakis.

Its the same Jan a gas cylinder leaking burnt my shop at Hamsa. Plus our 3-3. You see, we used to park the vehicle 5cms away from the shops door. Side to side giving no access to anyone. This is beacause thugs were used to break into our shop. By parking thatway everything was secure. When the leaking cylinder plus matresses caught fire, nothing was spared. Mwenye plot Kamakis started getting impatient that Jan. Akaanza ukora, I never paid the plots balance as promised. I had spent a lot on medication, repairing part of the burnt building na nikafukuzwa hapo. Also had to repair one side of the vehicle that had already burnt.

March, 2016

Mrs had returned home after serious medications and this was her 5th week. She had fully recovered diagnosed with zero condition. At the same time she was 4weeks paged. Tabby was in her 7th heading to eight month. We had kamuad the biz and that left us with only two shops.

25th March. It was on Friday. The same day Tabby used to cerebrate the moments she escaped her mother’s womb just to enjoy her own freedom like any other sapien. She used to enjoy that like any other slay queen… This day I had a special event for her and the venue was around 237.

Now, in every social setting theres this person who knows u more than you know yourself. There’s this Weekleak handler who told Mrs about all my deeds with Tabby. I had laid a plan how we gonna cerebrate over the weekend but had no form how to hatch the big plan. Mrs knew everything about us too but this time round things were tough. She received a text and a WhatsApp pic showing how happy Tabby held her tummy that she’s paged…Also a Facebook post requesting her fans to wish her happy birthday.

From the look of the things and from how I was served tea the same morning i smelt a rat. Not that my tea had rat poison but i never took it. The demons in Mrs sprouted like a cow on heat. As I left the house to pick the long weekends stock, I was grabbed by the collar from behind. Over the many times we disagreed with her, we have never fought (literally) we always fought with words. Her statement that morning was simple…[I].

" Nimerudi juzi tu na hujaacha kutongoza wanawake. Riu tondu ndianaguciarira kana ngagukuira ivu nikio uronire ugurire mumalaya uria uturaga ukimunda buroti naguku Ruai kana? Wana umugure kana umumunde, ninenuka na gwaku ndukambigua nginyithitie matende ringi.[/I]…(now that I’ve never beared a child for u, you have seen it right to buy a plot and impregnate that slut u are used to climb. Am gone and I’ll never step in your house again)…and she started sorbing.
Felt like I could slap her at some moment but Immediately after her statement i rushed back into the house, grabbed my travelling case, threw our vans key and told her…"Ananie ninenuka guku tikuo gwetu. Icio savi cia ngari, Niwe wikuu warikia ucokie murango".(Am also going that is not my home. Here are the cars key. You are alone there after packing remember to close the door.)
Sioni key pad.

Masaibu ya boy child kweli

hekaya iko swafi

Kwani umerepeat hekaya. Nitarudi kusoma later.

Nope. Just continued chronicles from July.
U rem pahali tuliachia?

Nakumbuka tu lorry ikichukuliwa na bank

Pekua pekua pages at your own time and join the dots.