Hi klisters, ; team mafisi its time to settle down. Tumechoka na story ya kulamba mchele, dry frying left right nd center, kupika , kufua and the likes. Lets settle down. Thought like minded bachelors and spinters would find this article helpful. marriage can be a matter of life and death from prenups, kids, taking that path all the way till being 6 feet under parts you.
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7 Questions to ask yourself before getting married
Question; Why are there so many people get divorced?
There are so many reasons that motivate people to get a divorce. Some of those reasons are: financial issues, abuse, trust problems, not being satisfied with the relationship and many more.
However did you notice that many of those reasons can be rooted to the fact that the person made the wrong selection?
In my opinion, being with the wrong person can be one of the major causes for a divorce. And when i say the wrong person i am not referring to a bad person but i am just referring to someone who is not compatible with you.
So can the divorce problem be avoided?
Yes in many cases it can be avoided if you asked yourself the right set of questions before getting married.
7 Questions to ask yourself before getting married
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Do i really want that person or i just need him?: Do you really want to be with that person or you are just getting into a relationship because you need to be with someone? Do you need someone to make you feel good, elevate your self esteem or help you feel loved? or do you truly love that person?
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Is peer pressure the reason i am getting married?: Are you getting married because you love the person or are you just getting married because all of your friends are already married? When choosing a person out of peer pressure then the chance of marriage failure becomes much higher.
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Do i really want this person or is this the best thing i could get?: Are you marrying a person because you really like them or because you believe that this is the best you can do? People who think that way usually end up feeling dissatisfied with their marriage
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Do i have realistic expectations of the relationship?: Do you have a realistic exceptions of the post marriage life or do you just believe that marriage will be the soloution to all of your problems? If the second case is true then there is a great chance that your marriage will be
unhappy -
Do i still like someone else?: If you still like someone else but getting married just because you can’t get that person then you need to ask yourself another question. What if that person came to you right after you got married and told you that he likes you back?
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Do i think this person is great or is it the opinion of others?: Can this person really satisfy
your needs (DFHKM) or are you choosing him because everyone is telling you that he is good for you. -
Can i be with this person Forever?: Unlike cars or houses relationships , in many cases, last forever. Are you ready to live with that person for the rest of your life? If yes then go ahead
If you can’t answer those questions right away then it’s better to stop and think
So many people do the great mistake of going forward with the marriage arrangement just because they already took so many steps. Those people end up sacrificing the rest of their lives for the sake of saving some of the effort they did in few months.
Those people prefer to get stuck for the rest of their lives in order not to feel bad for a month or two if they decided to stop the marriage before it happens.
Note that i am not asking you to stop your marriage but am just asking you to think very well before taking this step for the wrong decision here can result in a great deal of suffering.