10 Annoying habbits found in kenyan ladies

Unpropotional bodies, flat behinds,
tainted teeth, bad mannerisms and
low self-esteem; those are but a few
things that identify Kenyan women.
So if you’re a tourist out there
wanting to visit this beautiful
country and enjoy the “Kenyanraha”,
that is what you should expect and
if you’re thought that was it, then
you’re in for a rude shock as there is
more. Their behaviour and habits is
what makes them exceptional. Yes,
they might be caring and loving but
they also possess quite some
annoying habits that really make us
men hit the roof. So for the sake of
humanity and that of our tourism
industry (Kenyanraha), I’m going to
highlight just a few of them and
hope they take note and strive to
1# You ladies need to drop this self
-entitlement you bestowed on
yourselves. Let me start by saying
that you don’t DESERVE anything, at
least not for free. You have to prove
your worth before you can be treated
like a queen. How I’m I expected to
open doors and buy flowers and
maybe call you honey when you
don’t even have the common
courtesy of saying thank you? How
I’m I expected to buy you the latest
Mark x when you can’t even
pronounce your name properly? How
I’m I expected to take you out to
Java for the first date and you eat at
a kibanda for lunch every single
day? How I’m I expected to fly you
to Ol Jogi Ranch and pay 18 million
for a week when yesterday you
mentioned you were rocking the
same panties you had the previous
day? Think about that my dear
sweetheart is that what
“Kenyanraha” and promoting the
country is all about?
2# You need to learn how to dress
your bodies. You can’t surely look
like a hippo and expect to look good
in tights? You cannot have your
stomach resembling a pumpkin and
expect spaghetti tops to look good
on you. I believe in magic or maybe
miracles but it never really works
like that. And you skinny mamis, low
cut tops are just a no no- yes even
you Lupita.
3# Oooh the weaves, do we really
need to go there. If you have to rock
them and I mean sincerely rock
them have the common decency of
washing them and contacting the
services of an expert saloonist to fit
them. Oooh and cheap is not good
at all.
4# You ladies need to know the
difference between sexy and slutty.
Going to dinner with a bit of makeup
and that LBD is sexy but rocking the
same outfit to work is just slutty.
Dancing provocatively with your man
at the club is also sexy but bending
over for anything that walks in the
name of yoloing is simply slutty. I
could go and on by the way but I
don’t think that’s what “Kenyanraha”
or “Nairobi Raha” is all about.
5# So let me give you some advice
ladies from your dear men, there is
nothing attractive with a woman
who can’t handle her liquour. So if
you never really know when to stop
imbibing those shots of vodka until
you find yourself dipped in the bar
toilet, then you’re not classy at all.
And who said we enjoy carrying you
home every time we hit the bars?
6# Can we even start talking about
the level of basicness you ladies
possess? It’s all fun and games
when we’re blowing up my money at
the club while taking selfies but you
can’t chuck your ten bob and buy
me tropical sweets when I claim to
have a sore throat. Plus who said
men are the sole breadwinners?
Aren’t you the same people who are
constantly ranting on the streets
that you need equality?
7# I must say you Kenyan women
can be really dumb. Instead of
spending all your time posing for
photos to post on instagram, how
about you catch a book and educate
yourself a little bit. Okay, watch the
news and at least know the name of
your president, gaddamn! And you
dare ask why we just see you as
objects of pleasure.
8# Lastly, you need to stop with this
fake emergency bullshit just to
extract money from us. I know we’ve
being boosting you all the time but
I think it’s about time we call it
quits. So your house just got burnt
down and you want me to send you
300 bob, I mean how daft do you
think I am or rather how daft can
you be?
9# Okay maybe just one final one,
those beads around the waist just
don’t look good. I don’t know who
lied to you that they’re sexy and
they make the sex exceptional; irari
says they’re just plain stupid and
10# Now the last one for real; you
Kenyan women who are all about
airing dirty linen on Facebook and
twitter, that’s not cool at all. I
believe a lady is kind enough to let
their man keep his honour no
matter what. Isn’t he the same man
you were calling baby when you
guys were kicking it in the sheets
without protection?
Well, I think that’s just about it but
you’re always welcome to add more
points or even counter some of
them. Don’t however forget that I’m
just a messenger.