When I was fifteen my parents separated. I stayed with my father while the rest of my siblings went with my mother.
I assumed both of them would handle it like grown ups, but they did not especially my mother. She started turning my sisters against my father and every single time they would come to my father’s place ther would be a fight. She would also slander him to me and try to turn me against him by telling me things about him that I did not need to know at that age.
My father is good to me and my sisters and has always been. He wasn’t to my mum. And I understood her frustrations, but it was her approach I detested.
At seventeen I got tired of all of it and so I called my mother and told her I wanted to talk. She thought I was going to tell her that I was coming to her side on this foolish war she had created. Instead of that I sat her and gave her an ultimatum, she stops the sh.it or I cut all contact with her. I didn’t even know I could do it, but I held my bluff.
She didn’t buy it because she thought I was just throwing tantrums.
I stayed for eight months without initiating contact with her even at the insistence of my father and other relatives. At my eighteenth birthday she did come around and admitted her wrongs to me and said she would stop involving my siblings and I in the tussle with my father.
Years later they still don’t fully see eye to eye, but at least we get minimal fall out.
In short, there is nothing that scares a mother than the threat of losing her son, especially if he is not a loser.
@Six Thousand Blankets , now that’s how mature people handle a disagreement, talk to the offending party right to their face, iron issues out. based on your narration what you went through is probably more painful that loosing a paltry 100k and you never insulted your mother back then and you haven’t insulted her now like @kingsolomonn2016.
Different people deal differently with their emotions. And it seems he lashes out, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a problem that needs to be listened to and helped.
I hear u brother, i understand ua predicament and unfriendly past life that is sometimes orchestrated by our parents…
Many innocent children suffer in silent the painful war that goes on between our parents.
Talking from experience
The worst are those who slowly edge into their children’s minds not through love but, ruthless manipulation. They are non violent, but damning like hell itself.
You have a very valid point, some mothers are very manipulative at times. Some like to project the image of being the victims whenever things fail to work with their baby daddies/husbands.
I hear you on this. Even douchebags grow up to be parents. They won’t suddenly become saints. (Not in any way saying your mum is a douche). My mum’s tragically flawed in some aspects… but I won’t lie. I see the angel wings and glowing halo every time.
My parents separated while I was in class two. Due to the nature of my dad’s work we couldn’t stay with him and had to stay with my mother. All my siblings fought to go to boarding school and me being the youngest, I didn’t get why. I finally understood.
Whenever I meet this women of “I’ll wait for my husband to do it” or “sina uwezo/there’s nothing I can do” or those who aren’t proactive I exponentially break Usain Bolt’s records
Mature discussion. always liked this chap though m not sure kama yeye si @Gio. Though me thinks Gio is a nice lad too. @Gio = @Giovani Jnr That’s for sure.