Hii kitu sijawahi elewa and it applies to both men and women. Ukiwa somewhat maisha iko poa relative to most people you interact with, you start to notice tendencies that put the others at a disadvantage. One of those tendencies is conversations via text or voice. Its a social dynamics thing.
Wacha tu nikuwe honest. If I call you nikikuhitaji and every time you pick the phone, ama nikutext and you reply SECONDS later every time, my conclusion is that I have some leverage/power over you. Once I notice that I can reach you any time I want, I conclude that I have you squarely in my back pocket. Sometimes mimi hutext watu wanareply in seconds nashindwa kwani hawananga jobs ama other priorities. They are too eager to please and without knowing it, they place themselves at a disadvantage.
If I can reach you ANY TIME I want, then I can’t value your time. It doesn’t matter if its the president calling, sometimes kuwa unavailable kidogo nijue you got something else going on in your life. Take a few hours to call back after a missed call.
Nikishajua simu zote unachukua instantly, na text unareply after seconds every time, I won’t tell you, but I lose a little respect for you - its just human nature. If you will drop anything you were doing to fit into my program, its obvious I own you.
Naona inawatchingi TikTok motivational videos. Ni ukweli lakini. Being too available cheapens your brand. Its even worse if you are chatting with a lady na unareply instantly. Heshima itapotea
It’s all about demand and supply of opportunities. If I think you can help me I’ll be quick to communicate regardless of whatever priorities I’m currently engaging in. Kama uko na history ya omba omba of course nitakulenga. Average person doesn’t have time to play such mind games whenever they get a call unless they have a relationship with the caller.
This is exactly what I’m addressing in this post. You fail to realize how your perceived “helper” views you. Kwa hii post nakupea his point of view. The more available you are, the more I lose respect for you. Nikishajua you will drop everything for me, its very easy to exploit you. You have already shown your hand.
Let me tell you something that is ironical but true. I will invite you to crappy situations, and invite your more tactical friend who takes time to respond to better networks because he values his time more. I automatically conclude anajibeba poa hatakudisappoint by being too eager to please.
What I’m saying is it doesn’t matter how he views me because I’m also benefitting. If everyone worried about how the other person viewed them then nothing would get done in this world. It’s their problem anyway, they have to deal with it, it has nothing to do with me as long our interaction benefits me.
Yes you could argue that you’ll be an easy target for exploitation but then how do you learn who to trust if not by that same interaction.
True. Because in life there are owners and doers. The doers (majority) work for the owners. If you use “everyone” as a benchmark, and majority lose, then you lose automatically.
You also have to consider that the owner akikukosa ata call mwingine then your opportunity to benefit vanishes. So for majority of doers, what other people think is not as important as getting an opportunity to benefit.