Thank you for your practical advice on relationships. I am almost 40 and have been married for almost 10 years with two lovely children. Early in our relationship, I suspected my wife (then girlfriend) was cheating on me with an ex but after getting reassurance from her, I forgot about it and we moved on and got married. I later discovered she was actually cheating on me.
A few years into the marriage a friend provided me with evidence of her cheating but when I realised the girl was also interested in a relationship with me I discussed the issue with my wife and we soldiered on together.
She travels a lot and of late, I noticed a complete change in her behaviour when she comes home. She literally lives on the phone and walks with it everywhere she goes within the house. She recently came to the bedroom when she thought I was asleep and started chatting with a male friend at about 11pm. When she discovered I had seen some of the conversation she hid the phone and deleted the chat. When I asked her she denied having chatted with anybody. When I insisted she owned up and said she doesn’t know why she deleted the chat and said there was nothing between them.
We talked and I thought I would forgive her but I realised that the contact still continued. When she is home she disconnects the Internet when she is not near her phone probably fearing a message will come in and I will read it. I also realised she is ridiculing me with her boyfriend and there is no longer exclusivity between us. If anything, I am the stranger.
This to me sounds like she was not genuine in her apology and I have no trust left. I have put a lot in this marriage but cannot stand a cheating wife. We married in church but I want out. I wonder whether I have grounds to ask for a divorce and I am so confused about the children who are innocent in all this. Despite small misunderstandings here and there, people around us believe we have a perfect marriage.
Marcus
For being so stupid this guy deserves what he got.
:D:D ambiguous and amorphous answers always serve to maintain the status Quo. She must have been Kibaki’s advisor during negotiations into the formation of the grand coalition government.
Anyway whatever advise this guy will be given won’t help him since he comes across as knowing what he wants to do and that is NEGOTIATE AGAIN with the girl. He is only ranting and blowing off steam let him have his fifteen minutes
Hii UPUS ya kitoto inakuaga ya kujitungia… Mtu anakitungia story na anajijibu… Gazzeti ni kufunga nyama msee izi story peleka kule ---------->>>>>>
That guy has psychological issues,no way a woman can sleep next to me while texting another man either the story is poorly made up or the man does not have a source of income ,hiyo ni makalio ,throw the woman out and life goes on.
Quite a sensible man if you ask me. Unlike the majority here who masquerade as Alpha males but in reality are just a bunch of dimwits. At least this man has tried to put a lot of thought into the matter. Marriage is not just another contract like most others out there. He has considered the plight of his children if he was to walk away from the marriage, he has considered the loss of time and effort he has invested in the marriage, he has considered the financial implications that result from divorces. If you noticed, he has discussed the issue several times with the wife until ascertaining that her infidelity is her choice.
Although separation may be eminent in this case…I’m sure he is the type of guy who will go through steps that will ensure his kids don’t face a tough future.
