Village Political Scientists Needed

Greetings, I’m an aspiring MCA looking to vie huko interior Bunyore. Hakuna kitu inaendelea tangu 2004 na naona nikama wetu wamelala sana. Any pointers on a strategic campaign to clinch that seat, and in terms of campaign funding what approaches should I pursue. Running with UDA, since it’s becoming quite popular in that region. Asanda kwa maoni.

Sema tu hustler tosha and boda guys are in your pocket

Make sure you attend all funerals however small and marry a second and a third wife.

Ata sijaoa bado, niko 27.

Still vie and the first thing they will do is to gift you a free wife.

Bunyore wapi…if its Luanda township sahau hutawezana na atingo…pia hapo wemilabi akhwale is now worth hundreds of millions. Unless ni North East bunyore ama pale Central bunyore …and prepare to spend…am not even an aspiring politician yet I fund a soccer team so you can imagine how much politicians use every weekend

Tafuta musito @Masood, the guy understands grassroots politics. Though najua he’s currently quite busy being courted by politicians as we head towards 2022.


Ingotse sio bunyore bana, hio ni kule kakamega county…I know each and every village in ingotse

Bila bibi hupati kura ya men ju wanaona utawatombea bibi zao,meaning,hupati kura from females ju chali zao hawatakubali

Let me help you for free though…all bunyore politicians and the two mps are tight…they shared those seats amongst themselves and are looting together.
For a start head to club Harry’s pale umoja especially leo jioni…you will meet a good number of bunyore technocrats and thieves …ukikosa hapo enda jogoo rd roddy’s club ama kitengela hatrick club…kuna ingine rua but have forgotten the name…buy those guys a round of alcohol na utulie uskie vile siasa inapangwa…more will fly in via evening flights za kutoka kisumu …they can’t miss those social gatherings…
Kesho most will fly back to luanda via kisumu for a few projects and fundraisings then jioni watakua pale club tororo or roddy greens…Sunday ni fundraisings kwa several churches then a football tournament or two then back to nai na evening flights. Make sure you join this group ama usahau siasa ya bunyore…and while at it adopt a soccer team and about 10 women’s projects and fund them generously for the next one year…then help renovate a church or two, preferably church of God…and still this will not guarantee a win:D

  1. Bunyore enda na ODM ama UDA
  2. Find a popular gubernatorial candidate to ride on his ‘funding’ and also grassroot support
  3. Pea nduthi men reflectors with only your name and picture on them (jina itembee mapema)… also shikana with those bodaboda chairmen waite meeting atleast every end-month and let them give you tangible reports venye uko kwa ground…
  4. Bank your support on mostly women na madem ikiwezekana date the most vocal ones from every sub-location (invite them for drinks when you visit ocha and insist on them spreading your name around). - Fund pia group za wamama sanasana
  5. Use social media pia… most village folk are still into facebook… buy a local populous facebook group and change it to your campaign brand or tip the admin to promote you

Precisely that’s it. Money first. MCA on average will need 4 M to win. May vary on region. Consider popularity of opponents.
If UDA is popular you have some advantage. All the best OP

Nice. Women are a more reliable voting block. Men for campaign/ marketing

Reminds me of certain MCA alikuwa ameniweka kwa entourage yake.

We were distributing ‘shukas’ kwa wamama. Wamama were told to queue and one by one to be gifted with the shukas to ensure they continue giving birth to the future voting generation.

The guy dishing the ‘gifts’ disputed the gender of one Mmama; alikuwa zile sura ya cover the face and fire the base.

Wachana mmama alete noma na kutoa boobs nje with a rhetorical question “Kwani hizi ni Pawpaws?”

To summarise the story-mkutano iliishia hapo…wamama walivamia entourage and every man ikakuwa ni mguu niponye.

Nunua wheelbarrow uchomele kwa roof ya gari yako, then wait for victory


Then he prays an MPig dies some time after 2022 aingie via by election.

I love your points banae. Any aspiring thief can learn something.

Nimejulia hapa kuna place inaitwa Bunyore. How are the women there? Any photos?

How much does this venture cost you monthly? Am thinking of doing such for the neighborhood youth. Niplan na ngapi?