Uhuru speaking :Kikuyus of Ktalk, translate for the non Kikuyus here

Mambo iko hivyo :D:D:D:D
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He’s sooooo confident

Next week on a day like this, the Ichaweri thug will be chilling in Ichaweri. Once in a while, he will be receiving calls from top assimiotics asking him if he can reverse the inevitable loss. The Ichaweri thug will simply ask them “sasa mnataka nifanye nini?” He will continue imbibing in his Heineken unbothered.

The lion of Sugoi will be the fifth. You can take that to Equity bank and earn some interest. We will be here insha’Allah!

The burukenge of sukoi will be caged on tuesday. You can take that to the HSBC Bank in London.

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Anasma, he now agrees Ruto will be the 5th + karata imeshezwa

Kalenjins were nice people then in the last 3 years mkaanza kutumia opioids and all of a sudden mkakua delusional. Retrace your steps

Ushapata kazi? Nilikuambia uanze kutafuta kazi.

Two days remaining. Opposition hautawezana. But if you insist, be ready for 10+ years in the opposition. Ole wako! Nakuhurumia sana

By the way how does it feel to know that all your dreams, ambitions and insults will come to an end in 48 hours? How does it feel knowing that the man you have campaigned against like your life depends on it will be your president for the next 10 years. It is about to gooooo doooownnn!!!

You’re actually insulting us unknowingly. Being told you’re nice is an insult of highest measure. We don’t want to be niiiiiiiiice you mathafuuuuuuucker!

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Drunken gibberish

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Tunangoja transleshen

He is wishing baba a happy retirement.
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Hapa Uhuru alicheza Ruto 10 - 0.
Mlisema akona kura moja, sio?

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Anasema hakuwa na agreement na mtu yeyote agreement ilikuwa ya kupeleka nchi mbele yani inshort anaruka ruto kipetero

Hehe, what’s the meaning of tugul?