This is what Obama will say once he is in Kenya.

People love identifying themselves with successful people. It’s not surprising that Kenyans still hang on this belief that Obama is half-Kenyan or that he is ‘our own’. Obama may have Kogelo blood in him, but mentally he is as white as Hilary Clinton. However, due to him being half-black, he had to subconsciously and even intentionally ‘over-please’ white America for him to be accepted and voted as the POTUS. It’s for this reason that Obama cannot dare speak in details about the horrors of slavery or even about colonialism in Africa. Again, its for the same reason that ever since he became a public figure, he has cleverly tried not to associate himself too much with African Americans and Africans. When you want to be accepted by white America, you’ve got to be more white(mentally) than them. It’s for the same reason that Lupita tries all the best she can not to identify with Kenya. If ever she will speak about social issues, expect her to talk about how we need to embrace gays and lesbians and some sh*t about ‘’liberating women from patriarchal structures’.

Back to Obama. Expect him to address these issues that will endear him to the liberals in the US:

A) We need to accept gays and lesbians and enact laws to protect them. He will remind us that we must respect individual preferences. He will say something to the effect that, in future, Kenyan-American ties will be based on how well we treat minorities(read gays and lesbians).

B) We need to fight corruption if the US is going to continue with its ‘aid’.

C) He will assert the US government commitment towards fighting terrorism and say something to the effect that the ‘American people’ are firmly behind us in our battle against terrorism.

D) He will blubber out some anecdotes regarding his father’s ‘dreams’, about his precious visits and how he loves the country and its ‘warm people’. This is to make everyone from the president to the chang’aa imbibing loafer in Kibera feel good about themselves.

E) He will tell the youth that they are the hope of Africa and how much the US is willing to help them in their pursuit of dreams.

F) He will say anything expected of a liberal, white POTUS. You know, making us feel like democracy is the best thing that happened in Africa.

In short, Obama’s visit will be more about disruption of normal life due to the immense security arrangements than about any real substance.

Kenyans should understand that the man visiting them is a black man with the mind of a pure white, liberal American. Despite all his flaws, Bush jnr was more African than Obama.


Reserved for comments:

P.S POTUS - Presidents of the United States

he owns gold mines in every corner of africa…hence the percieved generosity towards africa

a bit like a rapist who uses KY jelly.


I expect traditional dancers to shake a leg at the airport(or they’ll be kept away from the airport to not show we still hold on to ‘barbaric’ dance). Top government officials will be in new suits and JKIA will be repainted. Of course TV cameras will surround the area of interest like hyenas over a carcass.

Thats the way the world runs…woe to those who delude themselves with thoughts that he really cares about us.

Hapo umeongea

Point D… hehehehehe… cracked me up…

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