The Previous Investment Trap

Those who gave you distance when you needed love, remember to give them the distance when you’re done with the crisis that you needed them for. It may feel cold to exit people from your space this way but allowing them to love you only when it’s convenient for them will hurt you more in the long run. There are people who say they want to get all their children with one person and so they stay on with an unloving person just because they’re too sensitive to shame. This fear doesn’t solve the problem but it merely digs them deeper into the loveless situation. Would it have been easier to start over with one child or to add more and then try to pick up later? Any further you go with the wrong person after you’ve known they’re the wrong person for you is entirely your own fault. It’s better to prioritise your peace and freedom from stress and pain than worrying about whether you get children with the same mother or father.

(©️ Benjamin Zulu Ke)