The most reposted shiet on whatsapp this week

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Ploti yenye naishi ,haina any difference na
zingine,iko na mrembo mmoja anaishi keja iko
huko kwa kona. Mi nimemaster time yake enye ye
ni most likely kupatikana nje,especially ile
anaendanga bafu.
So nakuwanga around nikisorora hio figure huku
nikiwish tu hio towel amejifunga ianguke kibahati
mzuri hehehe
Anyway,to cut this story short,jana jioni kama
kawaida nimetegea msupa pale nje akitoka kwa
bafuka amefunga towel. Akanismilia,akanipea ‘Hi’
design tofauti na siku zingine hadi msee nikajua
sasa ‘am almost there’. Akaingia kwake nami
nikarudi kwangu nikijiuliza mbona nimeshindwa
kudai namba na hio mood jo. Manze niliji-jamia
karibu nijipeleke Police Station na nijireport juu ya
hio ufala yangu.
Kidogo kidogo nikaskia mlango kuna mtu
ameknock…kwenda kufungua ni kamboch ka neiba
hapo nilinyandua like 2months ago but tukakosana
juu kalianza kudai doh ya madhake ya chama,sijui
mara siz yake mdogo amefukuzwa shule,halafu
nikikopa M-Shwari nimsort keshoe naona amevaa
weave mpya na amevaa heels hata hajui
kutembelea…yote tisa,I refuse to be a sponsor at
my age for that age!!!.
.
.
.
Okay,sa huyo mboch kumuuliza anadai aje
akanisho,‘‘Laureen amekwambia uende
ukamchangie bulb yake imeungua’’ Shiiet! Ni ka
sikuskia poa but msee nakwambia venye
nichangamkia hio maneno acha tu! Kabla
ushangae,Laureen ni huyo demu msupa malaika ya
ploti hapo. Yaani venye steam zilinipanda karibu
niite msee wa nduthi anipeleke kwake ki-VIP man!
Kwani nitatambuliwa aje?Nikajipiga
marashi,kuchana nywele kiasi,mswaki mara nayo
na kwenda.
Nikabisha kwa demu halafu venye alitoka
amevaa,ustake ona!! A very clear(or is it light)
nightdress…yaani zile za see me through,no bra
naona tu ‘NOON’ na evening,chini hapo ni G-string
inatoshana sticker!
Nikakaribishwa,kuangalia kumbe bulb yake
haijaungua! Hapo ndo nikajua hio ni ka set-
up,Laureen alishasoma signs namtakanga but sijui
kujiongea.Haidhuru,nikaona ameingia kwa handbag
halafu akatoa packet! Guess what was in that
packet??? Akanipea akismile na kunisho hio ndo
tunatumia.Taratibu nikafungua ile packet,na hapo
ndani nikapata kulikuwa na zile bulb za kutoa rangi
mob tofauti tofauti.
Wenye huenda kwa clubs wanazijua

.ookay,nikatoa ile enye ilikuwa halafu nikaweka hio
mpya. Kuwasha tu hivo,ikawa inatoa lights design
Laureen alionekana akiwa msexy 100 more times.
Sasa hio ndo ilikuwa the perfect light n atmosphere
ya kunyanduana jo! Nilistedisha ka fala hadi
nashuku pia ye alisense

After kumaliza akanisho niketi kwanza apakue
supper. Mi nikalegeza belt na kutoa hadi shirt
nikabaki na vest pekee ka msee ako kwake,
almost kuwekelea hadi miguu kwa meza.Akaanza
kuserve chicken na wali wa pishori na vitu zingine
mi huona kwa TV tu zikifunzwa kupika. Sasami
unajua nimezoea ile madondo chafua ya
kibanda,nikaanza kushikwa na wasi wasi juu sijui
ka tumbo itaniharibikia nikila hizi vitu za wadosi.
Kucheki,kitu ilinishangaza akaanza kuserve food
kwa sahani tatu!Kabla tuanze kula akasema,‘‘Hunny
,welcome the dinner is ready’’.Nikasema ‘Thanks
beb’…Tena akarudia kwa sauti kidogo
tena,‘‘Sweetheart,c’mon the food is ready’’…mi
na
kiherehere yangu nikaanza kumjibu,‘oh babe,I can
see you are a great cook and…’‘…Kabla nimalize
kajamaa kafupi kakatokea kwa kwa pazia ya
bedroom na kusema,‘Wow,what a great meal
you’ve prepared today darling!’
Ndugu yangu sijawahi stuka hivo! Ile mguu ya
kuku nilikuwa nimeuma karibu ini-choke!Kabla
niseme kitu Laureen akaanza introductions,’‘Babe
this’s my neighbour Vik mwenye nilikuwa
nakusho ule mboch nilituma akamwite ni demu
wake…and Vik ; this guy here is Steve. He’s my
fiance,ni venye ni mfupi hakuweza fikia pale juu
kwa ceiling kuchange bulb ndio nikakuita…’’
.

…nimekuwa discharged hosi saa hii naambiwa
nilifaint katikati ya introductions…

u
p
u
s
s

This is the 10th time am seeing this here. Am demoting myself to a NV. Kama huna kitu ya kupost just let it be.

Nimesoma last paragraph:
U
P
U
S
S
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This stuff was posted here a big while ago not sure whether that was the original post probably before kichwa kibovu and the like

Poleni mimi hakuona, taking cover.

imesemwa…

This belongs huko D dump site.

saw this here about amonth ago…:oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops::oops:

Seen it before but still hilarious

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That’s why unaitwa HOMOWEBDEV

Me too i saw this long ago…too bad thursday haijafika aeke TBT

Me too i saw this long ago…too bad thursday haijafika aeke TBT

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Hahahaa…
sema ni influence ya N.Vs

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Bado nimesmile.:):):slight_smile:

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Never read it before. Made my morning. Thanks:)

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