The Internets were Built for whiners.

So I came back from visiting my parents on Sunday and spent the whole day cleaning… dust is the devil’s fart fumes…it’s everywhere. The following day, Monday, I went to work with a smile and the brightness of someone who is filled with their mother’s cooking… until the workload hit me. It’s like the demon of work and toil fixed a scope on his asshole, aimed it at me and just let it rip. I am starting to think that growing up and moving out of my parents house and living on my own wasn’t a good idea. I have worked for almost 70 hours now and I am starting to lose whatever holds my mind together so I am sitting here typing random shit so that someone can insult me and we can start an online fight. I would start one IRL, but I am on the verge of a promotion and I would not risk all the ass kissing I’ve done for anything.

My FWB met a guy she thinks is the one and has cut off our engagements so now the number of girls willing to have NSA sex with me without a hustle has fallen down to negative one. The only slut I know that has ever shown interest in me has a boyfriend(s) and I do not fuck women with partners I am aware of… I am starting to have a tingling sensation on my right palm, but I have faith the devil of Onanism will be defeated through prayers.

There’s this girl who seems to appear when I am wearing the same pair of pants… I like her… we talk… but I think at the back of her head she isn’t psyched about dating a guy who owns just a single pair of trousers. Do you have a similar experience?

Anyway, on Tuesday after work I passed by a Supa to buy some supplies. As I was standing on the checkout line I noticed a woman checking out my Oats so I stared at her… after she was finished with her observations she looked up and our eyes met…for a moment I thought she would smile and look away shyly… because you know… I am attractive, but nope, she stared straight at me and asked how I could stand eating those “slimy” things. I told her I don’t boil them, but instead I blend them with milk and sugar and eat them raw. She then asked me what that looks like and I asked her to give me her number so I can send her a picture tomorrow morning (My smoothest line this year) … guess what? Noooow, she smiles and looks away… this woman is opposite of everything. At that point I am feeling down because I am not attractive enough to make a woman blush and my smoothest line of 2016 is laughable. So I forget her and start staring at another womans ass… they say the best way to get over a woman is to stare at… Anyway, I pay and as I am heading out I see this woman standing outside who looks familiar and and she looks up and I ignore her and head straight home. It hits me once I get home that that girl I saw outside was the same one I caught ogling at my oats and maybe she was waiting for me to seriously ask her for my number… at least that is what I am telling myself to cope with it.Does this story make you angry and cringey? I hope it does because I don’t think it is important either.

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Your prayers will be fruitful and Palmela will be defeated! Amen!

Also jaribu hata 1 hr naps during your workday itasadia.

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Stop struggling with this mbishes. Ignore them, they will come.

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Amen, Fappren, she shall be defeated.

I will try that in a few minutes…

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nice read. the wheel of fortune turns my friend

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Lakini jua that Palmela would help hasten the falling asleep process.

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He he he! So how do I get them to notice I exist in the first place so that I can start ignoring them?

Poa sana will stay strong.

You blaspheme and consort with the demons… begone! Afadhali piriton lakini itanifanya nikue groggy for the rest of the day.

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:D:DPalmela pia atafanya upunguze desperation ndio uwache kushinia madame macho kwa supa. Embrace her and she will open new walls for you.

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He he he! No! Kushine macho ni lazima tu hata ukiwank mpaka Pharisee aanze kukohoa hewa tupu.

You can be the funny guy or the shy guy, Be a boss, walk confident, make it seem you have things going on for you, be a ‘gentle’ fisi, don’t try hard, leave them hanging, don’t show too much interest basically be ‘nice’ and ignore them

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I will definitely try this…

you should change your handle to Algayoats

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Oh yah, and the smart guy/handy man

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Good God! What is happening to me… I can’t even think of a good comeback for this. Matako wewe.

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Or I could just tell them my family name and make them want to trap me with a pregnancy.

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You have a strong sense of entitlement! Not sure if that’s a bad thing considering it’s somehow related to self confidence. Recently, I had to feign urgency in a public office for one cute girl to share her number for follow-up purposes. We had a lovely date on Monday… funny how other girls who had seemingly friendzoned me seem to have created interest since then.

:D:D

Interesting read