I have found a kindred spirit in Benjamin Zulu. Zulu says, that marrying anyone in dire circumstances is a bad idea because they are not themselves. They are in survival mode and have put on a persona to help them survive. In fact there’s couples who have the best relationship when they were broke but wakiomoka they break up immediately. When you are in need of help, you can put up with so much. A bad boss. A bad lecturer. Hardship. A person who you would not marry if you had choices. You take what you can get bcz beggars can’t be choosers but it’s not what you really wanted. The person is a stepping stone and once you can now afford what it is that you really want, you go for it. Another thing is that you don’t want to continue with the person who reminds you of a past you’d rather forget once your struggle is over. In his book Invisible Man, Ralph Ellison says that when the black man makes it out of poverty the first thing he does is marry a white woman bcz the black woman is symbolic of the struggle he’s escaping. How poignant.
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I can’t understand the nonsense that some of the kikuyu men are playing, you stay with your wife when you are poor and have nothing much but immediately umeomoka (you have made it)you look for a second wife or get another woman pregnant. Look at Muigai, Kiengei, Njogu, Kori and now Samidor, what kind of nonsense is this?" she posted.