I am wary about single Moms who can not clearly explain how they got to be that way. I advised a long time friend of mine that if a woman is not a single mother by choice, as in she gave birth while with a man but cannot clearly explain why and is vague its better not to. Now my pal hitched such and after they got kids, it’s like she changed and is acting weird, she treats the outside kid better and has even refused to chip in for anything even for her kid she came with.
Personally as a single woman I have refused to get involved with divorced men and single fathers bcz I don’t think that a woman can go to an extent of marrying you and getting your kids then she walks away even leaving you with her kid and going to marry another man unless uko na kasoro kubwa sana.
I know women who are single mother by choice Yaani they were not married or in a relationship but decided that you were ready to be a mother and you wanted your own blood and not adopted kids. That one is ok but this one of you just found yourself pregnant especially when you were not pregnant then jamaa aka kuruka is not a good indicator of your character. It shows that you are careless and not principled and you have not been protecting your posterity by avoiding pregnancy when you are not ready and with a man who you are not sure if you even want to spend your life with him.
The people I respect is if you are widowed or if you made a decision to get pregnant by yourself with out pressure from a man who has not married you or by accident as in it was an unplanned pregnancy. Ile tuu umeona hupati the kind of partner you want and instead of lower standards to expose your children to low caliber and even toxic dad, you decide umeachana na mambo ya wanaume you just want to dedicate your life to raising your kids and living a man free life, sio ile you are a single mother but you are sleeping with men and even bringing them home to your babies. You live a life of a nun. Thanks to technology you can have children now never having had intercourse with a man. We need to bring back the lifestyle of not having sex with people you are dating bcz nowadays people have sex even unprotected sex with people they barely know. The next thing is pregnancy and deadbeat dad’s. Nowadays you can barely hear ati a woman is in a two or three year relationship with out sex. But I can tell you from personal experience that it is very possible bcz whether we like it or not sex is very risky activity which you can pregnant and also incurable disease and even condoms are not 100%. Let’s normalise not having sex with people who we are not married to.
I myself can go out and get kids via intercourse but I rather pay a meter for an IVF conception because I am not ready for emotional baggage, custody battles and etc. Mashida za wanaume staki, I have enough of my own. Staki stress mimi. Ni nini nimekosa so that niende kujitafutia Mashida? If you can manage to live with out these men and raise your kids comfortably, zalia tuu wazungu and leave chimpanzees in the zoo where they belong.
I am kinda seeing someone but I am going ahead with my plans, next month I am starting the prepping to do the harvesting.
Pritty Vishy is the one who can wezana with these gaidis. Me I just want a good time and some laughs and then I go back to my stress free life.
Btw he’s handsome bring your sister I introduce her. I won’t be dating anymore once the buns are in the oven. To you this is all hypothetical but I began in March and I am steadily moving to the goal. I don’t need to seek anyone but Jesus. I am blocking people this one it’s only bcz he’s a man of God otherwise I would have blocked him too.
Of course once those munchkins arrive I will not even have the energy to say hi let alone seeking. I have told you that I have thought about this for over 10 years. Its not on a whim. I can not put any man before my children, so I will not even date or consider any relationship as a mother bcz my kids come first. Not men. Wish me well in my endeavors I’m a mighty woman of valor.
Sex life? With which libido? This artificial baby making process is the most unromantic thing ever, when you are with a man you are crunching the numbers sperm count, osmolality, morphology, genetic makeup, hereditary traits probability . I feel like I am on a date with a lab rat.