Seven etiquette skills while dining in public

At The English Manner we train people all over the world on etiquette and how to behave in social and professional settings. Everyday here is different. Sometimes we are working with a deputy-CEO, who would like to finesse their interpersonal skills to gain a competitive edge. Or maybe we are working with an individual wishing to increase their knowledge and skills in social settings. We also work a lot with children on building confidence.

One of my most interesting recent clients was a really humble man who had found himself suddenly courting a Japanese princess. He felt he would let her down with his lack of dining skills so he came to us for two days of intensive training. He really didn’t have much to worry about and was a great student — he knew more than he thought he did.

Dining skills are one thing we work on at The English Manner, along with drinking etiquette. Here are seven mistakes people might make while drinking at formal events and celebrations.

  1. Clinking glasses during a formal toast
    A lot of people dislike it when I say this, but when it comes to formal settings you don’t clink glasses. This is because they’re usually made from fine crystal glass, or a material that’s very delicate. Instead, you should hold up your glass and make eye contact with those around you. From there you’ll give a toast.

You can say something like: “Richard, happy birthday,” or maybe you’ll call them president or king if that’s what they go by. Either way, when toasting eye contact is important.

If you’re in a setting that’s less formal — specifically in Britain or America — it may be allowed to clink glasses. For example, in a pub or a bar, you’re most likely drinking from thicker glass. These cups are designed to go through the dishwashers numerous times a day. They won’t break as easily as formal glasses that are finely made.

  1. Using a straw to drink your cocktail
    When in a formal setting I don’t like using straws as they are too casual and relaxed. To me, they look a bit childish. Also, if you’re someone who is using a straw to drink your alcohol, you can actually get drunk quicker.

This is because you’re taking in less oxygen, and oxygen helps dilute alcohol. So, if you’re someone who is drinking their cocktail from a straw versus someone who isn’t you’ll get giggly much faster. I recommend no straw.

  1. Taking a shot of expensive tequila
    A lot of people like to ‘shoot tequila,’ as they are using it as a party drink or as a way to get drunk quickly. Now, if that’s your goal, that’s fine — especially if it’s the cheap kind, the kind you don’t want to taste very long. But if you want to savor your tequila you should sip it instead.

  2. Drinking from a bottle
    One way to elevate your sophistication is to unscrew the bottle and pour your drink into your glass. In my opinion, bottles are storage — they aren’t cups or something to drink out of.

  3. Serving drinks in the wrong glass
    Taller glasses are normally designed for carbonated or fizzy drinks as they can hold the bubbles a bit better. For example champagne flutes or high ball tumblers are meant for drinks that are fizzy, whereas shorter glasses are better for flat drinks.

  4. Stirring a cup of tea clockwise

When stirring your tea you shouldn’t stir it in a clockwise motion or it may slosh over the side. Instead, you should stir it in a north-south motion. This will help prevent sloshing from happening, but of course, you still have to be gentle about it.

This motion will also help if you’ve added any sugar to your tea or your coffee. By moving your spoon back and forth the sugar will dissolve quicker.

  1. Serving tea with the tea bag still inside the cup
    Another tip with tea is to remove the tea bag when serving it to someone, that way it doesn’t hit them in the nose when they drink it. Really, it just looks unappetizing floating at the surface. Instead, you should keep it in for as long as you need it, then remove it before serving. It looks a lot nicer that way.