Peasant talk: Avocados

As anyone in the know will tell you, when the month is at a crossroad and funds are tight and the only food you can afford is something dour and flavourless, a well timed, well placed avocado can come to the rescue like the knights of the vale at the battle of the bastards.

The only issue is that sometimes a healthy looking avocado turns out to be watery (maji maji) with a funny taste. After experimenting, I found that you can get around this issue by picking the avocados with a rough skin. What I still don’t know how to deal with are the avocados with an unfairly large seed.
https://healthylaps.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/img_00202.jpg
Does anyone have any idea how to evade these bastards?

15 Likes

"As anyone in the know will tell you, when the month is at a crossroad and balls are tight and the only pussy you can afford is something dour and flavourless, a well timed, well placed lanye can come to the rescue like the knights of the vale at the battle of the bastards.

The only issue is that sometimes a great looking lanye turns out to be watery (maji maji) with a funny smell. After experimenting, I found that you can get around this issue by picking the lanye with a rough skin. What I still don’t know how to deal with are the lanyes with an unfairly large pusscy.
Does anyone have any idea how to evade these bastards?"

Fixed

23 Likes

Are you seriously talking about avocados or pussies? Kuna talker alisema chagua msichana ugly hawezi kuwa amechapa kila mahali…

1 Like

"As anyone in the know will tell you, when the month is at a crossroad and balls are tight and the only pu**y you can afford is something dour and flavourless, a well timed, well placed lanye can come to the rescue like the knights of the vale at the battle of the bastards.

The only issue is that sometimes a great looking lanye turns out to be watery (maji maji) with a fishy smell. After experimenting, I found that you can get around this issue by not picking the lanye with a black skin. What I still don’t know how to deal with are the lanyes with an unfairly large pusscy.
Does anyone have any idea how to evade these bastards?"

More fixing

4 Likes

Pick the big ones, more oftenly they have small seeds.

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:frowning: Hmmm! :frowning:
:frowning:

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Never had any luck on avocados ndani ni maji maji na kuzidisha ina nyusi tupu.

I forgot about the stringy ones. I don’t know how to evade those either

stick to bananas

https://media.licdn.com/mpr/mpr/p/6/005/09a/123/349a9d5.jpg

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A lil salt will do

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Angalia hii ngozi vizuri. Hio ndio avocado ina mbegu ndogo. Hizo zingine sijui ngozi nyeusi, sijui smooth skin, WACHA!

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Hii ni ya export, loco ni nyeuthi

Now this is what I’m talking about. This is the sort of avocado mimi huona kwa wingi in Nyeri

ati export?
Ungeongea mambo ya indegenous na exotic

utawacha kununua’cado na pesa ya sadaka…:D:D:D:D:D

on a more serious note though i’d recommend the hass variety; shida ni kwamba in areas such as embu and kirinyaga they are now going out of season…

http://whatscookingamerica.net/Foto3/AvocadoPhoto.jpg

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Hass najua ni petrol station

Hii kizungu ju unaenjoy monopoly, siku moja utatudanganya

We need another authority in English for confirmatory purposes… hata ka ni @Mundu Mulosi , yes, its that desperate

10 Likes

Hass avocado - Wikipedia

its wikipedia steelo, …its a weak pedia, … @gashwin could have written that in the few odd minutes he been silent

@gashwin …Shots fired!

what shots? i only borrowed the image from the net. i grow hass.