There is a group I am in where a certain mama is going thru this. Her lastborn came for holidays and now one week or some days to school reopening , the girl who is a Form Three tells her she needs to take her to hospital. So the dutiful mother moja kwa moja hadi hosi. Now, the girl didnt want her mom to be in the consult. However afterwards the doctor called her in and told her -the mom, that your dear daughter needs a small surgery. Mama wa wenyewe akashindwa hii ni shida gani tena. So long story short, the mother had to part with 100k to enable her 16 year old Form Three girl to get stitches in her rectum . After the procedure the mother took the girl home and asked her daughter - WHAT HAPPENED and WHO DID THIS TO YOU??? The girl upto now has stayed MUM . The shocked mother is oscilating betwyou are een feeling livid and feeling helpless and so sad for her daughter. The lady can not bring herself to even tell the girl’s father , what is going on. Guys how can she go about this.
For me who believes and have believed since I was a child that if you are not married even if you are 100 years old ,you are not old enough to have sex with anyone let alone a sixteen year old and sodomy. The current environment is so hard on parents because Ive even had my friends tell me theyre getting condoms in their 13-15 year old bedrooms. What are parents to do surely? These children will kill parents with stress. What is the problem? If in our time a woman could date a man for years and never have sex with the man and that is somebody who is over 18, sasa these kids a holiday of less than a month, how or where or could such a thing happen? Its mind boggling.
I have this male friend who is a single dad and his last born is a girl 16 and he told me he took her for a shot of Gardasil , which is a vaccine for HPV and I was mortified but I know that theres parents who are even putting their teenage daughters on long term contraception - the ones that last 5 years.But I am like what message are you sending with these kinds of actions arent you giving them license/your approval to be promiscuous? And what if they get AIDs ? Theres worse things than pregnancy and HPV.
Even when we grew up, the world was a dangerous place but our parents went the extra mile, to protect us. Even if it meant being kept under lock and key . You couldnt go to peoples houses or on holiday camps or on out of town trips . Our folks were strict and it helped protect us. When my boyfriend in campus would hint he would like to have sex with me , all that came to mind was how my dad was gonna chop me up into small pieces if I ever went into that mess . Nowadays kids are on their own.Mara sex parties. Mara theyre drunk. Mara theyve killed a teacher because they were high and the teacher confiscated their phone. We had the fear of God put in us, we respected our parents, our teachers, ulikuwa unaona mwanaume approaching you in a suspicious manner ,you take off in the opposite direction like you’ve seen the devil. Where did that innocence of childhood go. My goodness!!! Compared to many kids nowadays I am very innocent with all my years on earth. Theyre so desensitised. Theyre so jaded. Theyre so so lost. Its not like there were no kids doing drugs,abortions,eloping, when we were kids but they were like 1% nowadays its the upright child thats an anomaly not the deviants. Its very harrowing to be a parent in this era.
Discipline levels zimeenda chini sana…i blame parents
The fact that wamezoena hivi na mzazi,shows she doesnt respect her or trust her guidance as a parent.
In our days mzazi akikohoa unaitika even if your not sure, neighbour akiona ukifanya blunder anakusnitch or anachukua sheria mkononi
iyo beating kusema ukweli ilikuwa nikama programme…even now remembering the pain you got as a kid still gives you the memory of what not to do…
Saa hii jaribu usnitch ama uguze mtoto wa wenyewe utajua hujui, they getting pampered!!
To answer your question what i would do if this happened to my child i would uninstall the old programme install a new one and reboot the system. lazima kieleweke kwangu
Hio kuchapwa is what needs to make a comeback big time. Beating the devil out of the kid. Yaani ulikua unachapwa na baba,mama, househelp,mwalimu. And we had discipline, ile even if your parents are in another continent, the fear theyve instilled in you, is omnipresent, huwezi hata fikiria kufanya makosa. I remember jamaa mwingine in our esto dropped out of school to be a tout when it had alot of money because the dad alikuwa ameenda job outside the country , when the guy came back huyo kijana alikua anapigwa daily , locked in the house, for one term,akifanya homework, he grew up to be very successful btw. Girls used to be shaved and locked in ukianza kusumbua wazazi -
This here is a single mum of six kids na unaona vile anakeep jeshi in check, Kenyan mums one 16 year old girl be giving you sleepless nights
Feminism is to blame ,my body my choice, Yule kijana yako alichunishwa managu’s ,being a parent is like playing Russian roulette unaweza Lea a very successful child ama a complete disaster. Hii ma drama ndio sipendi #mgtow= freedom
The effects of physical abuse on kids are lifelong and similar to those of slavery. The kids grow up tolerating oppression and violence, and in their adulthood, the police takes over the role of ‘kuchapa’ while leaders pilfer public resources with impunity.
Sisi tuliwork hard tukiwa ushago ndo tuende Nairobi juu ndo tuliambiwa kuna pesa…We got jobs in Nairobi and this meant we were busy leaving our kids na maids who cared less about what the kids did.That made the kids curious and knew more stuff by themselves without anybody guiding them unlike us whose mothers were housewives and knew our every errand.Kids have grown up watching porn and using drugs without the parents knowledge…WE ARE TO BLAME FOR NEGLIGENCE CLAIMING TUKO BUSY
False percentage kubwa ya wenye huchapwa na police and are involved in corruption n fraud ni wenye hawakuwa disciplined, kwa izo effects kwa watoto i would rather have a kid who is tolerant than a kid mwenye anachunishwa sukuma
if you discpline a kid achunishwe sukuma atachunishwa ukimdiscpline ajue that is wrong hatachunishwa it all depends on how you programme your child si mambo na tolerance
Boss I was beaten because of forgetting my sibling at school,beaten for forgetting tables -multiplications,beaten for wrong answers, beaten for doing homework wrong, beaten for accepting a sweet from a stranger(kiosk owner),beaten for not making it home in 15 minutes after the bell rang,beaten for anything and everything. Many people wonder how I can be born and bred in Nairobi, I have never experimented with drugs,never done many things 12 year olds of nowadays have done. ‘Physical abuse’ is one of the best things that ever happened to me.
Me and most of my friends were born and raised in Nairobi and are extremely well mannered , parenting is the key.
Today most young parents think its "sophisticated" to live their parenting roles to the maid or the school teacher, that’s why in the new curriculum, homework is designed to force parents to be active participants in their children’s lives.
Its not about involvement btw,sijui knowing everything your kids are doing. Both my parents worked ,matter of fact, one time ,my momma one Dec couldnt get leave off of work so my dad had to take us to shags alone, the guy almost killed us with the way he was cooking till my nana had to come to our rescue.
Here is how my parents did it, there was no leaving the house to go hang out at people’s houses because this is where all the trouble starts,kids are molested in other peoples houses,doing drugs,watching porn , having sex. So it was lock down at our house. Camps za word of life which is where most kids end up starting to have sex , we never went, hell , we couldnt even go over to sleepovers at our cousins house. Even when I got older my dad would bribe me not to go on trips that needed sleeping away from home. His word was law and it didnt need to make sense .His house,his rules. No room for negotiation. That totalitarianism needs to come back. A household isnt a democrasy and kids are not equals.They need rules and discipline .PERIOD. Not friendship.
When we left school, the househelp had instructions that gate should be locked by 4pm, My folks got home around 5.30pm to 6pm. 6.30 latest. Gate ikifungwa, you must climb the gate or jipanga kupata kichapo. Our neighbourhood had drugs, had people who prey on kids and even people who were kidnapping kids, my classmate was kidnapped in class 5 so my dad was like we must come home together. Ofcourse we’d just walk with our friends and then ukikaribia home wait for each other.
The househelp was mom 2, she could beat you and she was responsible for you when paros arent around, we respected her, so my paros comfortably even travel away together and leave us with her and know she will keep us in check. One time they had to do work trips abroad and they asked my auntie to come stay with us and she was used to spoiling us, aki when they returned we all were sick coz of eating icecream everyday.
