Blessed sunday Elders, sponsors, and ES. Hi to Senior villagers. New villagers and villagers, I am privy to a map that leads to a deep quarry excavated by The Chinese where you can go take a running jump, brary foko jembe. It’s a beautacious sunday so let me narrate.
Juzi, friday, pretty early in the morning, I left the freezing hell hole that is our capital and set my eyes South towards the Indian ocean to rejoin my adopted county in time to send one deserving old man to retire with his agemates despite the many who are freeing. I had no time to wash the Pujo which had the day before been to the Kiambu Hinterlands to lay to rest a very courageous and a never-give-up young niece who had bravely fought a condition that was meant to inter her at two weeks of age but had fought it off for 20years.(Till we meet again, Carol, may you rest with angels at God’s best shades). So the Pujo was as muddy as they come. With me in the Pujo was an Import meant for the long weekend starting Tuesday till they tell us He has accepted defeat.
The Import, a pretty faced curvy yellow yellow whose growth had stopped midterm at 4’10", with some sparkling eyes , a pair of very sensual dimples and a succulent smile, was perched shotgun, clad in Siberian frostguard topped by a Maasai shuka that hid the safety belt that held her tightly in her seat mitigating the Pujo speed. I aimed to be fast coz I had other ebgaments that needed my presence in Tudor by 4pm.
Coming down the Athi river bridge, a traffic cop flagged me down, went through the Pujo with a tooth comb, literally, and eventually busted me for a defective brake light. Like hell he did. My pleas were dead to him, I guess he had to make his arrest quarter for the day, before he went back to his core duty of fifty fifty. So he took me to the station where I was booked together with other godforsaken drivers, we were liked in a very stinky cell for an hour or so before being parade before a magistrate. I was fine 5k or 2months at Kamiti maximum death row in lieu. My Import paid instantly and we got back on the road. I was quite rilled for loosing 5k to a brake light that costs 200bob. So I fixed it hapo Mavoko town, and bought five spares for another day.
Wait a minute, what was I narrating about…ohgg ywr…the Tanked oil. Isorait.
So we got back on the road and if earlier I was in a hurry, after loosing two hours to a brake light, I was now attempting to break the sound barrier or Mach 1 whichever the Pujo would manage first. Machakos Junction was a speck of dust as I hurtled down A109 aiming to overtake anything on site. At one point, I was really pissed becoz the Pujo was moving so fast I had to yield for it to pass, but I regained in time. The plains of Konza were at hand.
Doing a lazy 140km on the dial one downhill, my eyes fully fixed on an exposed piece of skin above the Imports knee, I let Autopilot take control. Normally, am not much at eyes on the road crap. I mostly drive by Sonar pings and a brain corrupted GPRS that a was given to me courtesy of a Homing pegion that I snared, caught roasted and ate one July winter as a young boy on the slopes of The God mountain.
The Import, her intoxicating smile playing on her lips and attempting to cover that which was bringing me such joy, blushed twice and shifted her eyes back on the road.
Suddenly, lo and behold, her eyes shifted to alarm, shock, dismay and utter horror, as she shouted “Ngai!” Pointing ahead.
In less time than it will take chebukati to say “the incumbent wins”, I went into Defcon 1. My right had dropped to bellow the carpet where I keep hidden the sawed-off Winchester, to dispatch to kingdom come whatever the cause that was causing my lady’s alarm, my left hand reached for the NASA connected Techno to Alert Huston that an unidentified ICBM out of North Korea has been spotted enroute to Kennedy space station, my left knee arched up and took the wheel, and right foot whispered above the brake peddle intent on bringing the Pre-German Union contraption to inertia in exactly 8.7 nano seconds. All that happened in less time that I shifted my eyes from the now covered thigh to the road ahead. By the time I registered what the " Ngai!" patented, the Pujo had scaled down to a comfortable 80km, the safety catch on the Winchester was off with the barrel stub firmly forward scouting for a target and the Huston call was on final exchange in Pasadena.
Up ahead, 300meters or so, an oil tanker had lost control and jumped the road, the ditch and now was in a barbed wire fenced field somersaulting and raisins one hell of a dust cloud. Seeing that my Import was not in any immediate danger, I dropped the rifle back under the mat, ended the Huston call, took the wheel and brought the Pujo to total halt just in time to see the oil Tanker plough head first into a raised Anthill and come to rest on its left side. Instantaneously, three men bursted out of the mangled wreck like a cat out hell, limping and staggering, and screaming, and wailing and generally disoriented but having enough presence of mind to know that the damn Tanker would blow any minute. Presently, the driver of the hell bound truck was still trapped in the hissing mess. My human instict kicked in and I opened the door ready to go help my fellow driver. My Import screamed and got hold of my hand and would let me go. Meanwhile, the freeing trio heard the screams of their driver friend, hasted just enough to decide that saving a brother is better than saving self, then they all run back, pulled out their badlyy hurt friend and drugged him like a carcass across the weathered earth to safety. By this, two vehicles and a truck had arrived at scene. The three bewildered men shoved their driver in the nearest vehicle headed to Machakos hospital just as the Tanker bust open and started spewing fuel. The import saw this and pointed out that the bloody wreckage would burst into flames in no time. It was time to put as much distance as humanly possible between us and the Skunking metal heap I shifted to drive and leapt away like a comet, and when I was 1km away, I slowed down to 80km per hour, a speed that I dutifully maintained till I parked outside my residence at 8pm.
When we you embark on a journey, ask God for Mercies, and whenever you arrive, Thank God sincerely. Don’t ever take safe arrival for granted.
Blessed week ahead friends. Let’s all vote peaceful, go home and await the results. Let’s all pray that he will accept defeat. And climb away the time, as will I.
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wonderful
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tadiha guthoma ino yooothe njoke njage part ya threshhold
your method of narrating reminds me of an x, interesting guy but arrogant as hell
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Thanks Wakini
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We worship a merciful God. Peace
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Hehehe. I always suspect that I know you outside hii kijiji. Itabidi tukutane to rule out ever meeting. Ooops, we shall have met so I will be a guy you “once knew” by default
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Indeed we do, bro. Indeed we do
ile siku nitakuja mambatha nitademand uninunulie lunch
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Welokamuuu, any day anytime, twice on sundays
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…Correction, ‘Wakinii’ , nonetheless you are a good narrator @mabenda4
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You must have scored thate naeni out of fote in kcse combosition!
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Good read. As always.
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You’ve just reminded me of @mabenda4 pujo chronicles ,nisawa tu.
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After you fled the scene at super sonic speed @vuja de na wenzake walifika hapo na kuchota maguta, even @pamba and the NTSA who arrived soon afterwards couldn’t stop them.
So waiting for Tuesday ni elect muthamaki and a new 001
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The flow is on point…I actually got immersed in the action…
Only to realise it was happening to somebody else.
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Hehehehe.
Good one Clawmatsu.
Thank God for watchful imports.
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Hiyo part ya DefCon 1 iko fiti mno! Lakini unamaanisha Pujo yako ni auto?
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Headache nayo…
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Hapo sawa @mabenda4 . The pujo, bado iko
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Hehehee. The power imports have to control even Mau Mau descendants amazes me. Eti akisema usiende to help you cannot dare?
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