Leo am just minding own business watching TV nikitafakari mambo ya kuenda supreme court to protest these sham Chebuchietha results.Ghalfa bin huu,a whatsapp message checks in.Inasema hi,I reply hi.Anauliza how are you,namshow niko fiti.Then anauliza niko wapi.Before I reply I tell her politely, si kwa ubaya,na sio madharao,hii number sina kwa phone book,imebidi niangalie true caller.Then I request her to tell me where we met.She tells me we met local flani zile back street za Tassia.But I tell her I always remember everyone tuli exchange nayeye number.The she lies that we exchanged numbers siku flani ati I was very high.
She then sends me a different photo from the one on her profile.Then I remember her visuri sana.But she is always in the company of those funny funny boys wenye huvaa mabati kwa mkono na meno.Then anawatoanisha makeg halafu akikataa kuenda kuwapa mavitu alikuwa anawahepa anakam kukunywa kwa local yetu.Wanakam kama wameshinda wakichungulia ndani kama machokoraa.
Akauliza can we hook up today?Nikashangaa coz the most we ever did ni kusalimiana tu,hata drink hatujawai kunywa pamoja.Nikamshow niko out of town but when I come back to Kanairo ntatembea hio mtaa nimtafte.Akadai sawa.Mi nikijua convo imeisha nikagongwa na basi nibaie lunch.
Nikajua baaaaas.Hii jangili imetumwa.Kuna tudem nimekulakula hio mtaa wenye ni mutual friends wamemshow ajaribu aone kama ntatoboka coz otherwise anaezaje kuwa na guts za kuniomba doh siku ya kwanza kuchat kwa simu.
Nikampanga nikamshow mpesa haina kakitu sai niko tu na ma cash angoje kidogo.Kufika jioni,akadai saa ile lunch niaje.Nikamshow lunch ishapita wacha tuone kesho.Akajibu ati badala ya lunch nimbaie supper Chinese rice chicken na peshen juice pale quickmart.A quick Google search showed me it costs around 700bob.Nikaanza kupiga mahesabu.Huyu dem hakuwa na number yangu,nikupewa amepewa.Kameiva lakini kanakulwa sana hio mtaa na machokoraa wakuvaa mabati.Hata akinipa PNC itakuwa hatari.Cost benefit analysis ikabidi niumishe yeye block.
Pole Kaka. nunua simiti ikaukie store.
Leta hio number pia sisi tuumimishe block.
Ata picha ya whatsapp chat tuone ile picha alituma banae…
Rio nderi kukoaje?
Pia wewe enda kunywa keg Kisha umalizie yeye kwa lodgings za Mia mbiri
I hate those Hi msgs out of nowhere. I think its a normal trend nowdays madem kusambaza number to their friends kwanza wakijua wewe ni wa streets. Juzi tu one tried to toanisha mimi nikalenga. Out of nowhere next day a strange number sends me a Hi. What a coincidence. I ask her where we met anasema kwa streets za tagged ati 1yr ago…so anadhani i wont remember whom i contacted a year ago. I didn’t fall for that crap. Nimepiga wote block. Ni kama economy imekuwa mbaya madem wameanza kwenda hadi kwa folder ya archives kutafuta old numbers
Hii story by the way huwa ukweli 100%. Any time mtu anataka kukupogisha PE na pesa zako, piga hesabu in terms of simiti ama mawe. Utaona ile ujinga unafanyiwa. For perspective, guarana mbili za 500 no mawe 20 za ndarugo.
Si watu watafute number za usherati na personal.
Ate hae? Just block and move…
Dem ukilipa fixed price hatarudi na hizo meffi texts
Kuna mwingine leo leo tu, amenitumia pic ati hako hosi amelazwa. Kuuliza niaje kunaenda … nikaona vibe yake vile inaenda ni ya kudai doo. Kidogo … amedai nimuokolee 5k ati ya deposit hosi. Nikamulikia simu jeshi yangu ya io mtaa yao kuulizia … wakanishow ndo huyu kwa base anamulika kibao quarter. Nikabuy msinga ya kibao kwa till nikasema apewe, na mboyz wangu msinga ya JD. Nikamweka block.
sitaki matusi lakini how old are you…ju ni kama una hangout mabaze zingine ata nikiwa colle nilikuwa na avoid 
I knew a river road peddler of @Agwambo caliber can’t afford a lunch of 500 Bob for himself so I was waiting in awe to read him say alituma hiyo soo 7 tuconfirm uongo.
Nimenotice pia
My baze my choice son.Ukiwa colle unge chagua aje base ya ku hang out na pesa ya mzazi.
Wee driver wa FH endelea kulipa maraya wazee wa Kericho na Bomet ksh6000 per seshen.Retirement is around the corner utajipata umejaza white hair kwa kichwa with nothing to show for your hardworking driving g4s lorries.Dont say I dint warn you.
Ama wale ‘mabeste’ wanago missing mawiki kadhaa then wana surface kwa whatsapp after kuona uko active kwa group yenye yeye pia yuko.Then he side chats anakushow niaje,niko local huku ocha maze niko ma kiu mbaya sana nirushie kakitu nichukue gilbeys kwota bro,mjengo inanipeleka mbio hata madirisha sijamaliza kulipalia.First question miujiuliza ni kwani mimi ndio Nina pesa za kununulia watu wanajenga manyumba zao pombe?Don’t even bother replying.
Pepo mbaya ya kuuza kondigo river road what do you know about money and investing. Seen your ilk struggling to define 0.01% of 14M then you are here pretending to be quantitative. Shindwe