Being a good Man that I have always been. I just dont know what was eating me that Day. It was Valentine’s eve and my girlfriend (now my ex) had told me she was going to visit her aunty somewhere in The County (greeks know where that is). Facts I later came to learn that were false coz she had been taken somewhere in Chaka Ranch with a Billionaire who had a car. I being a millionaire without one. Anyway a story for another day.
So this fatefull day I went to tao, sat in a bar with “lanyes” somewhere in River road i was kind off enjoying the scene as they came in all sizes and colours. I had said basssss I am finnaly home I can spend the night here. It came to 11 pm and all the young young one’s started leaving and were replaced with Women the size and probably age of my Aunty “Grace” to be specific.
No one told me to leave that place I just found my self out of the building and next to Thika stage along Luthuli avenue. “50 bob Thika” the makanga shouted “fifty fifty champe, unaenda wapi” that was the turnboy. I told him I dont have an Idea where I am going. Si utoe form natafuta base iko na madem brown brown i told the guy. Haya sit here next to the door. I will take you there.
Ghafla bin vuu a lady came and sat next to me nikasema Vualaa hapa nishawai she was not brown as I preferred but nikasema haithuru its a good start. The lady told me she was a second runner’s up in the miss MKU beauty pagent something I doubted coz she did not look like even a person who could have made it to the preliminary but haithuru she told me that and who am I to refuse that. She invited me to an uncles party who was opening a bar in Thika and that she was home alone hence we could go to their manson in a place called Makongeni later on. Wahhh this offer came so fast that I had to turn it down saying in my head mbele kuna mazuri kuliko hapa. The girl alighted not before reminding me utanipata hapa Coconut ukirudi coz I had to tell her I was headed to the ATM then come back.
Finally I was there the land of pineapples. The turnboy kept his promise as he took me to a modern club on your way to Blue posts. Wahh this place is nice let me enter and see coz there were ladies with short short dresses who could actually be the runner’s up compared to the cocochick i left behind. “We boss lipa entrace fee” Said a Broiler who was standing at the door. Aii that was so 2005 when people used to pay for admission and get a blue rubber stamp on your hand. Its okay I paid.
Battery running low I will finish this Hekaya later