hekaya… once upon a time i had a friend,from those filthy rich families. they owned coffee plantations around our place. i am a nyeerian. we used to pick coffee in their plantations as a mean of sustainance . we were close with this guy,i taught him everything that his high end circulum wouldnt provide.
from swimming in the rivers to climbing those female perspectives who had an early start.
i had this girlfriend(lillian my regular) also from a poor family. we used to go coffee picking as a couple. the guy,lets call him kim. wanted to know how i maintained a regular,who i could climb at a moments notice yet the only thing i owned was a climbing tree and maybe my life. so he approached me for advice despite him being my senior. so i was contracted to find him a pond he could take a dip without borrowing. back then there were morals,finding a such a hoes was a big task but i couldnt let him down. he looked up to me as modern day solomon.
without my knowledge he went behind my back and started,giving my lil some through passes. when i got wind of what was happening,i was actually happy since we were going to get rich. i and lil were getting hefty paychecks from the dude. it was just a matter of time before we owned a plantation of our own. i mused. since the hoes arent and will never be loyal my lil changed side just like kalonzo 07. i didnt mind,she had her big break. now nothing stood between her and fame.
what i didnt know was that,she is a typical female(cunning,convining and out to finish you). my pond visiting rights were reduced from everywhere to only in the darkest reccesses of the bushes. kim was now the official driver,who would drive lil crazy. what kim didnt anticipate was that,the fishermen had turned the fish and he had swallowed lil line,hooker and sinker. lil had already found a husband.
since,i never let a friend drink and drive. i embark on mission okoa kim. i adviced him on the dangers of the female species to no avail. he told me i was jealous of him and his new found love. fast forward lil enterpanua bore fruits,she became two in one. since kim was the main shareholder he had to shoulder the cross. kim married the first female he had intercourse with,even though i always found him some side dishes to change diet. eating omena everyday will make your smegma stink.
we lost contact with them both since i had to embark on a journey to look for my fortune. the other day we met with kim,he looked like a survivor of ISIS capture. his first question was “kawambui you let me bring up your son?” i answered “no if it makes a difference and yes if it doesnt”
he gave me a hallowing exprience of being married to my little lil. how lil couldnt get enough of anything esp the magical joystick. they are now divorced. lil gave him a daughter just to legitimise the union.
I TOLD HIM,WHEN YOUR FRIEND GIVES YOU ADVICE ESP CONCERNING WE-MEN JUST TAKE A MOMENT AND EXAMINE IT. IT MIGHT SAVE YOUR LIFE
hehehe, kawambui never stays far from kijiji
so you are a unga miller?
hehe.mwanaume ni experience kweli
ebu fafanua what is an unga miller isikuwe ni mlosi mwemye hulipa kodi nyingi ndio aishi karibu na poshmill
heheh. I learnt some new matusi today.
He took “never dip your pen(s) in company ink”, to a whole new meaning.
He he he, these women?
''his first question was “kawambui you let me bring up your son?” i answered “no if it makes a difference and yes if it doesnt”
So whats the true answer to this question? @Carbon
@Carbon malizia hekaya. Was the little boy your product
you should have deduced from the hekaya but yes. he looks just like me
Wanawake ni NYOKA! Ukipata piga kwa kichwa (mnyandux) and hepa!
keyword smegma
Hii hallowing experiance ni kama ile ya “hallowed be thy name” eh?
:D:D:D
haver no idea
No grammar Nazi.
No. Mr.Google says hallowing the process which a place or thing made holy. Hallowed then means holy.
Therefore in the context of @Carbon story,the word is used wrongly coz the experience of marrying and living with a cheating spouse can never be holy.
What @Carbon should have used instead is the word HARROWING. Which means,to cause fear,distress,discomfort etc.
YOU HAD TO TAG ME TWIE TO TEACH ME A FUCKING GRAMMER LESSON.
FUCH YOU SONOFABITCH
You know me @Carbon heheheheh. No hard feelings brother…
for me grammar always brings hard feelings.
it reminds how the white/brown man screwed our minds to the last grey matter
Re-read my post. It would prove that you are a real dumb ass if you made me explain the sarcasm in that post.
Its Grammar.