Masaibu ya Chifu.

Hapari wanakichichi. Kuna stori moja nimekumbuka nikaamua kuhadithia hapa. Ni stori ilifanyikia elder tulipokuwa primo pare Othaya maeneo ya the greatest economist Dr Prof Rev Emilio wa Kibaki.
Sasa ilikuwa hivi. Tukiwa kitu std three ama four(sikumbuki poa) kindu 40 years ago, nilikuwa na beshte mmoja alikuwa anaitwa Filifo. Beshte yangu mbaya sana. He was more than a brother to me. As in ndugu wa kufa kuzikana. Ni zile nyakati ambazo customers wa Kenya power walikuwa tu mabirrioneas kama kina @Deorro na kazalika. So the main source of light energy was kerosene. Hiyo time litre moja ilikuwa kitu three bob.
So tulikuwa tunaiendea a certain trading centre that was about 3km away from our village coz hata kijiji yetu haikuwa na pump. So siku moja ikahappen ya kwamba nilitumwa kubuy mafuta taa na pia Filifo naye akatumwa kununua ya kwao. Ilikuwa Friday jioni. Tulikuwa tunatoka shule mapema kitu saa tisa. So after kufika manyumbani kila mtu akachukua kibuyu yake tukaelekea kununua mafuta. Along the way just past kwa kina Filifo, kuna mzae fulani alikuwa anaitwa Daudi alikuwa na kamkahawa kidogo ambayo alikuwa anapika chai, mandazi, ugali na mboga pekee. The reason ya kuwa na hii kamkahawa ni kwamba hapo kwake kulikuwa next to a tea factory na workers wa hio factory walikuwa customers wake. So tukipita hivi, yaani mimi na Filifo, mzae akatucheki. Akatuita akatuchapa kila mtu kikombe ya chai na ndazi moja, kisha akatwambia atatutuma hata yeye tumletee mafuta ya fourteen bob. Na pia akatupatia ile kibuyu ya five litres kama ile mahustlers wengine hapa kama kina @uwesmake huwa wanaweka kwa boot za Vitz incase mafuta ikiishia kwa jam wanatoka na kukumbilia kwa filling station.
Sasa ndio hao sisi kiguu na njia. Tukaelekea moja kwa moja hadi kwa ile centre iliyokuwa na mwarabu hizo village zetu kama tano hivi.
Hapo ndio ujanja tukaingiza. Kabla ya kununua tukakubaliana kila mtu akate 2 bob kwa mafuta ya kwao lakini kwa mafuta ya Daudi tukaamua kukata four bob. In other words tukawa tumeunda eight bob kimchezo tu hivyo. Kari gani! Sasa hii haikuwa doo kidogo hizo time. Coz kikombe ya supu ilikuwanga shillingi moja na sumuni yaani ksh1/50. So tukakunywa supu kikombe moja moja, na biscuit za one bob zile za House of Manji na ujue biscuit moja ilikuwa ya ten cents. Kisha tukagawa balance by half. Kufupisha story, tukarudi makwetu na kudeliver mafuta ya Daudi na ya kila mtu kwao na kuagana tukutane keshoye.
Sasa kesho yake ilikuwa sato. Main duty ilikuwa kufungulia ng’ombe after breakfast na kuzipeleka malishoni. Na pia unabeba nguo zako na ile karai ya chuma unaenda kufua ukichunga mifugo yenu. Hiyo place tulikuwa tunapeleka ngombe ilikuwa karibu na river kubwa but siku hizi niliona imepungua sana juu ya deforestation na global warming. Pia during hiyo harakati ya kuchunga na kufua, swimmo lazima tungeifanya kiasi.
Sasa katika hizo shughuli hiyo siku, kuna kijamaa kimoja pia kia daro yetu kilikuwa kinaitwa Kimotho. Kilikuwa nephew wa Daudi. Sijui iliendaje Filifo akamfichulia, labda kwa kujigamba kwamba tulikata doo ya uncle yake ya mafuta. The next day naye Kimotho akaambia son wa Daudi hiyo story. Huyo son wa Daudi alikuwanga class eight.
On Monday morning, huyo son wa Daudi akatuhanda vibaya sana na akatushow hiyo week yote lazima tumleteage kila mtu one bob ama aambie mzae wake. Ikabidi tutii kukamuliwa namna hiyo coz consequences za huyo mzae kujua zingekuwa mbaya kuliko tu kurudisha hiyo doo yenye tuliiba.

Chifu mbathika leta hekaya ya venye ulikamua sista ya Daudi… Hii haijafikisha threshold…

Hiyo inakuja soon

He he he …I have a hekaya about being sent to buy kerosene but I think mine is more tragic!

Bring it on!

Hekaya iko wapi hapa bwana fikta?

angusha

You are the reason why 8-4-4 should be scrapped as soon as possible.Hiyo ni Kiriminooo…

Hapa ndipo corruption ilizaliwa Kenya

Vyenye jaKenya amesema hapo ju

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Nadhani ni yule alikula doo kwanza then kufika market akapata mafuta imeisha

Hehe … sadness of life

mada ya ya hekaya ilikuwa ni chifu… na kwa hiyo story yote ambago nime ona ume maliza na kuweka fullstop HAKUNA ANYSHERE NIME PATANA NA JINA CHIFU…

I was in class 4. We lived in one of the towns not far from Nairobi. My mum sent me to buy kerosene in one of the petrol stations in the town centre. Mimi ni mjanja. I had discovered another petrol station where they used to sell kerosene at a cheaper rate with like 2 bob. But it was far off on the other side of the town. You also had to cross a busy highway. My mum couldn’t approve that. But I had to save some 2 bob.
It was my secret for sometime. I would dash at full speed all the way and back to avoid raising suspicion. With that I pocketed 2 bob with every trip. I actually squandered it on the way home.
This day I was given 20 bob note. Kerosene was 20 bob a litre but huko mbali it was 18 bob. I decided to chew my cut before earning it! Nikabaki na 18 bob mashillingi. Makosa kubwa nikapata hakuna mafuta. I decided niende huku karibu nikapata pia hakuna. Actually no one had kerosene in the whole town and in the neighbourhood.
The journey from town hadi home took me forever. My elder brother came looking for me. Akaniambia walijua hakuna mafuta. Kiguu na njia kuelekea home All this time I ain’t saying sh#t to my bro. It was a monologue until at some point akauliza kwa nini nimenyamaza hivyo. What he didnt know was that in my mind i was doing very complex calculations.
My mum was a strict disciplinarian. My dad was lethal! I started contemplating running away. Not a single explanation was making sense. We got home at 9pm. I had left home at 6pm. I went to the kitchen nikaweka kibuyu hapo na pesa kwa meza. Haraka haraka nikaoga, dinner and went to sleep without saying much that night. I didn’t sleep well. The following day nikaamka mapema, breakfast, shule. It wasn’t a good day.
Jioni nikajikokota hadi home. My mum asked me about the money nikamwambia niliweka hapo kwa meza. She said it was less, nikaruka futi kumi nikasema hiyo sitambui. Akasema Leo kitaeleweka! But she didn’t have evidence. She thought maybe someone might have used the money in the morning. Hiyo story ikaisha hivyo. I never tried that again!

parents of yore hawakua mchezo.
wa siku hizi simnawajua, naming kids Dadii na mum, mwalimu akimchapa the whole clan comes to school. enzi zetu mwalimu akikuchapa huwes sema hivo nyumbani, ulkua waongezwa WAR,

Deorro the mbirionea who drives a Cayenne but flashes people and also carries left overs from restaurants.

  1. I don’t flash people. Learn to differentiate jokes and reality
  2. Carrying leftovers from a restaurant is not something to be ashamed of. Not everyone eats from vibanda like you. decent restaurants will pack the food for you in a nice way na uende nayo home. so stop displaying your ignorance for all to see

Feelings here, feelings there. Feelings over there, feelings over here. Feelings above, feelings below, feelings to the left, feelings to the right, feelings behind you, feelings above you.

Wueh! Leo mumekamata nini kwa hii kijiji … sanasana hawa ma mod