Latest Screenshot, Due To Popular Demand

I saw @Buckets begging for my screenshots on some thread and I said to myself, why not? Since I’m a man of the people, keeping my fans happy is my top priority. So DRUMROLLSSSSS!!!

I’ve gone a step further and calculated the post to likes ratio, since I wouldn’t want my biggest fan to hurt his fingers doing pesky calculations; it stands at 1:3.8

Which leads to a bit of a conundrum: if captain obvious is one of, if not the most hated talkers, why the bloody hell does his post to likes ratio keep rising?
This right here sounds like a Sidney Sheldon mystery, without a murder of course.

In my humble opinion, talkers hate me for three reasons:
[li]I’m awesome[/li][li]All the women on planet earth want to suck and ride my dick[/li][li]I have a killer sense of humor[/li][/ol]
I understand this hatred is really due to envy, ya’ll wish you were me. I’ll tell you something though, it’s not a bed of roses. The grass ain’t always greener on the other side. Shyet, now I’ll have to listen to the Chris Brown song.

Anyway, what I mean is you might really envy my lifestyle, but believe it or not it comes with downsides. Like waking up every morning to hundreds of messages from adoring females, dodging the panties they throw my way every time I show my face in public, too much pussy etc. I know kid, you think having pussy in constant supply is a good thing, but I’ll tell you, the person who said too much of anything is dangerous had a point.

Moving forward, I’d like to take my attention-seeking exploits to the next level. To that end, for financial year 2019 (I take this shit seriously, that’s why I’m running it like a corporate earnings call) I will invite various experts on attention whoring to give me ideas on how to take my game to the very next level. Any ideas @LeoK ? When my work on earth is done, I want my tombstone to read “here lies the world’s greatest attention whore”. That would be something gets a little emotional, wipes a tear

So as you sip your haterade, remember I’m the greatest, awesomest talker alive.
As you renew your membership in the hateocracy, remember captain obvious really doesn’t give a shit what you think of his awesome self.
As you commit your hate crimes, remember your female relatives would drop their panties for captain obvious at the drop of a hat.

And now, if you peasants will excuse me, I’ll go spend hours in front of a mirror subjecting the fellow in the reflection to intense interrogation. Today he must give up the secrets to his awesomeness. Johnny Bravo ain’t got shit on Captain Obvious :D:D:D

<?php if (Likes + Messages = KES) { echo "Mimi ni [B]musito[/B]"; } elseif (Likes == Mafwi) { echo "This post is Meffi"; } else { echo "Shut the Fvck up"; } ?>

So we’re supposed to wank to these using saliva

Don’t choke on it…


people thinking they are now celebrities on an anonymous online forum, SMH! . A wise man once said, “Ujinga ni Kipawa”

@admin I’m humbly requesting for protection from these salty ass bitch niggas :D:D


wah…thinking hard on this statement…matusi of the year

Ungeandika composition yako ivo kijana KCSE si ungekua Federal Reserve Chairman instead of wasting precious time seeking approval from virtual humans

you do realize hii ni anonymous forum

…makosa kubwa sana…saaaana

Plot twist: everyone who has commented on this thread so far is @captain obvious’ other handle o_Oo_Oo_O


There are two people in here, but handles ni kaa kumi.


that explains the 12k likes,ryt?

Andrew Kibe kamua Kamene Goro uwache kusumbua


Juzi ulituringia vile multihandling inaenda vizuri. If you create 20 handles and each likes you at least twice a day, fanya hesabu.

Ni kama mtu kuturingia threshold ya masturbation. :smiley:

20 handles would be extreme, that’s Bingwa’s forte. And the Waka conglomerate. I have 5 in total, three that I use regularly, the other two I’ve almost forgotten the passwords I used when creating them.
I know you won’t believe it, but I’ve never liked anything I posted here with any of my other handles. Hiyo 12k ni safi kama @pamba