Kenyans in the Diaspora

Kenyan real estate merchants, please stop marketing your homes/houses to people in the diaspora. Tumieni akili saa zingine. Do you expect somebody who lives 10000 miles away to purchase a house he only steps foot in once every two years or even once every five years?

Target people in Kenya!! Oh, I forgot you can’t because your whole business model is based on overpriced knockoffs. Uzia hao watu wako Kenya. Unataka Njoki anunue your apartment in Kabete when she is trying to save for a single family home in RONDON where she lives and works? Wacheni bangi wadau.

In 2024, only stupid diasporans buy property in Kenya. The smart ones are trying to buy homes and start businesses where they live. They’ve checked out of the motherland mentally and anyone with eyes can see that Kenya is one of the worst places to invest in.

Real estate Ads: Especially people in the diaspora……blah blah blah




Diaspora are east marks for mburoti maguta maguta salesmen. They don’t know the value of property since they are not on the ground. Unaeza mwambia property worth 1m is 3.5m na atakubali alipe.


Wacha they dispose them off to Diasporans. 99.9 % are trying to live the life they envisioned when they left. Ile perfect life that doesn’t exist. Big house, 3 V8s, 3 maids, watoi wanne wako Braeburn……Have you ever been to a party in the diaspora. Nilienda mingi. Literally everyone’s dream is to purchase or build apartments in Kenya. Unaskia Ati Yule ana apartment pale thika or is building apartments in Kisii. Saa hiyo he’s struggling uko diapora. Literally 99.9% of the residents dream of getting a remote job paying them in dollars or Pounds while they live in Kenya in Gigiri. Sasa unashangaa. You are a nurse or data scientist working two jobs 16 hours a day trying to match your life na mwizi tenderpreneur in Kenya who has stolen $5m.


The godfather, architect and grandmasters of modern day banditry; The legendary rustler (r.i.p), kama an high IQ individual person , figured it out mapema and reverse played the system. Mzito had several gok residential properties attached to him in major towns across the country through his office, that officially did not even exist. They basically were sort of safe houses (more likely black sites for interrogation/torture tho’) considering his line of work and therefore had em’ registered as private properties using ghost names he came up with… so technically he owned them. I suppose this arrangement was so gok and the regime could have plausible deniability of their existence incase shit went south with civil societies n western donors etc.
Well … few years prior to the curtains dawning on the Moi regime reign, my father started flipping them. Probably informed by raw intelligence reports that he had access to,that the Moi reign was over, nikaa jamaa hakaona heri kujipanga. Since he also had us relocate. But yeah … he would flip those properties and reinvested the money in real estates in both commercial and residential majuu mostly Canada. By the time he died in a tragic road accident in his beloved land rover, most of those properties were sold. Moi later donated to us whatever government properties we were occupying as a show of respect for the legend and those did not include the said clandestine properties … I doubt he even knew existed. And that was all she wrote …


Sasa unataka kuniuzia mburoti Machakos na niko New York mkubwa, aje sasa braza? Ikiwa Omondi wa Komarock amesema hataki shamba iko 50KM from the main road unafikiria someone in the diaspora atataka shamba iko a billion miles away?

Most of them are clueless. The smart ones are buying homes uku tu diaspora.

Uko na point. They always have one foot in their countries of residence and one foot back in Kenya. Little do they know that you can’t succeed in two locations at the same time. They crave what they’ve always known. That’s why I only encourage young people (25 maximum) to move. People who moved here while younger are able to fully settle and make this place their home. Older people always have that nostalgia of home ndio maana they build lavish homes uko Kenya while living in shitty neighborhoods uku majuu. Instead of improving their lives where they spend 99% of their time, wanaenda kujenga Kenya where they rarely ever go. Watu bure kabisa.


Mkubwa haueleweki.

1 Like

[quote=“Gaza, post:5, topic:470475”]
…l estates in both commercial and residential majuu mostly Canada. By the time he died in a tragic road accident in his beloved land rover, most of those properties were sold. Moi later donated to us whatever government properties we were occupying as a show of respect for the legend and those did not include the said clandestine properties … I doubt he even knew existed. And that was all she wrote

Kumbe nyinyi na wachinku ndio mlituma prices za mahao BC na Toronoo ku skyrocket

Nimelewo … mkuu. Pole. Lakini… nakubaliana na wewe, ku invest you hard earned money vumbistan, that you probably had to pick up a few extra hrs, working graveyard shifts in order to save in ufala ya hali ya juu. Wenye tuliiba tuli invest overseas for a reason. Alafu wewe, who worked for every penny overseas unacome invest here. Si tutaiba na tuende invest overseas tena.

You’re very correct . This isn’t even a Kenyan or African diaspora issue . It’s diazepam issue for just about every demographic. One of my early jobs after college , I had to go to their homes and see what they do … those who had kids ( I think you figure what that was). They see those who’ve managed to get the dual life going, enjoying it. Monkey see, monkey do. You can live in both places happily no issues but you’ve got to master the basics dynamics well. Ata wazungu they buy properties in islands, africa etc etc to get away from the daily pressure


Are you a Kalenjin. Kwa sababu moi only gave such govt houses. We had some neighbors wa gava in big houses. Kalenjin would come to the gate looking for mkubwa. Wanaambiwa sasa lazima “ uthoke” in 2 months. Jamaas took all those properties in Nairobi prime areas. And there was quite afew in Kilimani, Woodley, Lavington, Loresho, Kileleshwa, upper hill.
Sad thing is waliziuza zote before the latest real estate boom that’s been selling to investors who drop them and build apartments.


I would not thumb my nose at Kenya, not at a time when Babylon (America) is collapsing at an unprecedented rate. Civil war is a definite possibility at this point and more chaos, the likes of which has never been seen since the inception of the country.


Are you better off living off the grid in Kenya or the USA where in NYC you could freeze to death during winter? You cannot survive the collapse in America, not as a black immigrant. You have all these crazy MAGA people with guns, and if you know the Americans many of them are selfish and brutal.

Those who invested in Kenya will not look so silly anymore. Give it this year and you will see what happens. You better get out before too many people wisen up and head for the exit doors. At least secure a remote job and ride it until the wheels come off. I can foresee properties in Kenya and other stable parts of Africa will skyrocket overnight because of chaos in the Western world. Ask yourself why are all these wazungus suddenly relocating? What are they sensing? Sio kuzuri vile unafikiria. And please don’t let the stock market “boom” fool you. The left leaning Federal Reserve is manipulating the economy to help Biden secure the election but they won’t succeed because the fundamentals are weak. Have you seen the tech layoffs? People are crying. It’s bad!

1 Like

Punguza bang. If you think America will collapse and Kenya won’t, boy do I have news for you. Kenya is more likely to collapse than America.

I’ve said this before but I’ll repeat it for you: the westerners moving to Kenya are doing so because they can’t hack it in America. Things are fucking expensive here so every lower middle class American is heading to third world countries like Kenya because the dollar stretches further there ; not because America is collapsing.

It’s obvious you watch too much CNN when you mentioned black immigrants. Dude, Black people are the second most populous ethnic group. I’d be worried if I were Asian/Indian/Hispanic. Everyone considers black people here to be American first and foremost. Other groups are considered perpetual foreigners and in fact, there’s a huge rise in hate crimes against Asians/Indians/Hispanics because white and black people don’t want anyone stealing their jobs. As a black person, you fit right in!! I see it everyday.

Now, even if America were to collapse, do you think Kenya will last a day especially with Nabii’s over-reliance on foreign aid and the high cost of living? Poor Kenyans are more likely to overthrow the government than poor Americans are. Go figure.

1 Like

I have a few friends whose parents are bigwigs and they have houses in Surrey, UK. I believe you.

1 Like

When (not if) the global collapse happens, are you better off living on two acres in Muranga or Embu or in a 1 bedroom high rise apartment in New York?

When the stock market crashed in 1929 , if you recall reading in the history books, hundreds and hundreds of people would line up the streets waiting to receive once daily government rations of soup and moldy bread. In the deep of winter (The crash happened in October 1929). Thereafter those poor souls would retreat back to their cold, dank, dark homes with frozen pipes. No running water. But those times were much better, because at least people were nicer back then.

Can you imagine the current crop of vicious New Yorkers lining up decently for meager rations? Leaving your apartment for one second will be guaranteed gun violence and death.

At least in Kenya you are on the equator. There are no extremes of weather. Solar energy is free and consistent. You don’t need to spend outrageous amounts of money heating your home. You can survive and even thrive without a stable income in Kenya, whereas in New York you will be living in the subway or under a bridge.

The next question you really need to ask yourself is, what is the actual likelihood of a political crisis occurring in November, if not sooner? Read the news, listen to YouTube …… it’s bad and you know it.

What next? The choice is very clear.

1 Like

Look, I agree with you if America were to collapse but let’s be honest, America will never collapse hence your argument is moot. One thing is for sure though - Kenya can and will collapse. It’s just a matter of when. With this information, would you rather invest in Kenya or anywhere else given the choice? It’s a no brainer. Once again, stop watching too much CNN and YouTube. Go outside and interact with people. People are more rational than we give them credit for.

Kenyans are crying more than Americans are. Kenyans are less rational than Americans. Kenyans have a lower capacity to think outside the box when they encounter difficult situations and most of all, Kenyans have zero ability to govern. Kenya has a more likelihood of collapse than the USA due to the sheer number of idiots in comparison.


You worship America like it’s a god. We’re also in America bro, 13 years and counting and how I invest my hard earned cash is my business, I ain’t no fool for buying a house in Kiambu, owning government bonds in South Africa despite their hate for fellow Africans, kwanza nataka za Escom, which is worse than Kenya power, but agent says we wait. If anything, nursing and truck driving ain’t that bad as painted by you and locals back home, you work 16hours all your life because you don’t skill up, and own a business, you just wonna get employed. Investment is a form of speculation, that one day you’ll get better yields, buying a house/land in Boston, or Scotland, or Nairobi is all but speculation, if done right, you get great returns, location not withstanding. You’ve been here gloating about driving some Rolls Royce or was it Bentley, (must be damn old) and cursing anyone that decides to get something going on for them home, other than those funny cars, what else you got? Can you even lay bond to rent your own house ama you’re still squeezed in that single room your sponsor dropped you in the day you landed.

1 Like

You have a big dick indeed. Jibambe msee :joy: