Jumped into a busy long distant train juzi and i am seated in a comfy place at the back of the carriage and there are two empty seats in front of me and beside me.
Nobody likes sharing seats if they can avoid it and i was travelling like 250 miles with countless stops so i am watching all sorts of people hop on and off the train between stops while i tread along…
Kidogo this pair of smoking hot looking black women hop on and they take the seats just infront of me.
From their looks nikajijazia labda Jamaicans/ west indies hivi…
Train kabla itoke moja akauliza beste yake in a very Zanzibar Swahili accent;
“Naomba tikiti yangu najua utalala sasa hivi”…
Teren teren!..
None of them takes a second look at me so nikalenga ati nimeskia Swa sasa nikajiseti ready for some Journey entertainment hoping that they didn`t both fall asleep.
Coming from a City like London you don`t expect to bump into a Swahili speaker every time you see a black person so it can only get comical from here on in!
Kabla tutoke manze moja akapata simu and i can tell that she is speaking to a Polish guy on the other end juu the train is so quiet and she is literally infront of me!
20 minutes later and after ma - Lovey dovey most nikajijazia huyu dame ametoka kwa chali yake who is Polish and she is going home with her friend.
Sasa wacha waanze story!
Jeso wa Matuini! (Jesus of Nazareth!)…
Huyu manze ametoka kwa simu akaanza kusifu huyu chali yake Polish venye anajua kumlamba, kumtia etc…
All the while nimelenga like i am deaf but it was interesting the way her friend kept glancing at me with suspicion bado akiendelea kuskiza of their week long sexual antics!
Yaani women are more graphic than men ikifika kuongea juu ya wegeje and to be honest i almost got a bonner just listening to these pair talking about why they loved their Polish boyfriends and all they had got upto including ati Kufirwa!..
Sijui ati …“kajaribu kunitia kidole mkunduni nikamwambia akipenda anifire!”…
Beste yake na yeye anamwambia ati vile ashawai dinywa and got firwad Combi !..
“Kubabaye haujui utamu kama hujaliwa na wanaume wawili”…
The conversation got more and more graphic and all the time najidai kulala… But it wasnt long before my stop and i knew that i had to do something to get these Pair of dirty whores attention before nishuke.
So as we approached the station nikaanza kuchukua bag yangu etc and just as i walked to the sliding doors after the train stopped i leaned over to them and in a deep Swahili accent nikawaambia…
“Safari Njema dada zangu!”…
The Looks on their faces was worth at least 4 Birrion NYS Shillings!.. kkkkikikiiikkkkkkii…
These Hoez Just Aint LOYAL!