So nilikuwa na date with a certain Kenyan woman leo.
She insisted on us having our first date at my place plus she withheld her surname which made it impossible for me to work out what tribe she was.
That was the least of my problems.
Date was set for 5PM
Mimi leo kucha nimeshinda preparation.
First thing morning I bought all the ingredients for the ugali and oxtail kioweo…etc
Came back and did a thorough cleaning,bed sheets changed, bathroom scrubbed spotless,all dirty linen washed,dried and stuck away juu sina Pasi…
A new towel and face towel clearly displayed in the bathroom not to mention a new toothbrush.
Pack of condoms and a new tub of vaseline placed in the bedside cabinet.
An hour before she arrived I had a shower and started cooking.
An hour later …“ding dong” says my intercom and there’s someone at the door!
Roho inachapa with anticipation because I’ve never seen this woman in my life and here she is now!..
Simple introductions and I offered her a choice of full menu of drinks that I had including red and white wine,beer, juice etc…
Akadai ati she wants tea!..
( Hapo ndiyo nilijua Heuston we have a problem!)
Anyway,I finished cooking and invited her back to the kitchen ajiwekee…
Akajiwekea kidogo Mimi nikaweka kiasi cha mtu mzima juu I was starving at this stage and we sit down.
Mimi na tabia zangu mbaya za kukosa kuombea food I was caught just in time kabla I put my first spoonful in my mou!
“Hii chakula imeombewa?” She asked in a very firm tone of voice almost as if she was really offended!
Before I could say anything she reached out to her handbag and produced a Bible!..
Hapo ndiyo nilijua my chances of getting laid zimeishia!..
There is all sorts of weirdos on the net!
Niendelee ama nisiendelee?
Mathew 28:19
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,
cap
January 12, 2018, 4:27am
22
chunga ka mchele in the name of funga macho tuombe… utapata ume lalia cimiti
kama hata hujapeana description ya mwoman…it seems iyo kitu ilikua imechapa viajabu
Ken_Sarro:
Jamaa ameokoka
@Ruffneck naskia ulifunguliwa boot na @sludgist
Abba:
During my campus days nilipata mmoja kama huyo. Alikuwa ananiona pepo but nilivumilia. The day I thought I’ll lay her ,it ended up being laid. She was a friek in bed. Kumbuka bible is still kwa handbag.
To be honest don’t think hawa bible readers are that holy …no, they use religion to calm their wild side. If you are able to unlock it then you will be a victim …just saying. Anyway play along brother .
How do you shift gears from a strict biblical lecture to bedminton omwami?
Pole kwa roughneck if it was involuntary. Na wewe ulijuaje, ama we ni accomplice was Sludgist?
Kwani alikua wa jehovah witness amejidisguise kama date.
system
January 12, 2018, 6:03am
31
Wewe tishwa na bible na vile Iguana4 ama sijui ni Meria alinyandua mkorino in full gear.mimi Natafuta nun msupa
:D:D:D:D, Singizi alipotea, I am just trolling.
Abba
January 12, 2018, 6:10am
35
Words only . All women are the same hata minji minji…just words is all you have to take a heart
hcaikp
January 12, 2018, 6:10am
36
Yeye si wa Jehovah’s Witness? (JW)
Grundy
January 12, 2018, 6:14am
39
@KaBuda kuja umalize hekaya meffi…ama alikukata makagari?
Once had a double date with some friend, tukatayarisha, those days a desktop in the house meant you have made it in life. Tukaweka playlist with some gospel and secular music mixed. Madem wakafika we had a meal and then my friend akaweka wimbo. Secular music as we were chatting, kiasi a gospel song came on dem wa beshte yangu akaanguka to her knees and raised both her hands and started singing along. The song ended dem akaanza maombi. Whispered to my chick tukatoka went to my place reached the proverbial, twice then tukarudi to my friends. Tulipata amefunguliwa biblia anasomewa.