My two cents. If you start to feel uncomfortable in a relationship, angry, unhappy and frustrated, it’s highly probable that your partner hasn’t changed but you have. You have outgrown them. It’s like when you buy a new shoe you love then after sometime it starts to pinch your feet. It’s not the shoe that has changed. It’s your feet that have grown so since you loved the shoe and you paid alot of money for the shoe you can decide to hold on to the shoe and keep wearing it. You will get bunions, cones and you will be terribly unhappy because wearing a shoe that no longer fits you is painful. Eventually you will have to let the shoe go because the pain of wearing the shoe will be more than the pain of losing it. The flip side of this is that maybe the shoe was the catalyst that led to your feet growing. There’s no growth with out growing pains. Thank the person for their role in helping you grow. Remember that when the student is ready the teacher appears, believe it or not it was YOU who attracted and accepted that person into your life because you needed them to teach you something. You are not a victim because in life there are no mistakes only lessons to help you grow and become a better person and a more compassionate person and a wiser person and a more forgiving person because all relationships provide opportunities for growth. Not just romantic relationships. All relationships.
At the beginning of every relationship we are in love with the dream and the possibilities but kwa ground mambo ni different. Time helps you move from the dream to the reality. All relationships move you closer to reality and out of your illusions.
Number two, you can love anyone including the devil but you better differentiate what is good for you and what you love. Because you love someone or something doesn’t mean that it’s good for you. Allow yourself to love and let go. You can love a Cactus but if you hug it, that won’t be good for you, you may love lions but if you get in the cage, that won’t end well for you no matter how much you love the lion. It’s OK to love someone and not get involved with them because love is free and unconditional but life, happiness and fulfillment aren’t.
Sadhguru says it best.
