I’ve been a silent follower… Kindly do post this for me anonymously. Im Married with two kids… Started dating this guy(my hubby now) when I was still in campus… Fortunately or unfortunately I got pregnant… Had to drop out and nurse my pregnancy till I did put to birth with the help of my mum… During this duration… We were never in touch(me n hubby) I delivered then went back to school… 3and a half years down the line… We bumped into each other… Exchanged contacts(remember we never broke up) then parted ways… He called n then we decided to start all over again… This time round… He wanted me all to himself.so he asked me to marry him… (Without a ring though)I got pregnant again along the way. When we went for an holiday in coast… He said I’m his wife… And that we should just start living together… He then introduced me to his family members… And that’s how we got married… My hubby never had a job when we got married… (I don’t know if I should call him my hubby or not) so I supported the family as he hussled for a job… I never knew that behind my back he was still shagging his ex… He used to leave the house like going for a stroll or to get us a movie and he ends up at his ex’s place… They’d made out then he comes back home looking all innocent… So someday… I guess God just wanted me to find out what was going on behind my back… My phone broke so I had to borrow his phone… He dozzed off., then suddenly a message popped in… Upon checking it was a love message… I had to wake him up n asked for an explanation( I’m not patient by the way)… He was like ooh that’s my ex… N she’s been bothering me… Been trying to put her off but she won’t just lemme be… I forced him to make a call to that girl… Which he obliged to… Later the girl started crying telling him that she is gonna kill herself if my hubby doesn’t go to her house that night… He told her that its over between them n that she should do whatever she likes… I didn’t know that all this were just to please me… The next day very early in the morning… He woke up went to the shops… Borrowed a phone there then rang this ‘ex’ of his… Begging her not to do anything silly… That he said all that last night just to please me coz im pregnant and he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to me nor the baby… So this lady rang me n hurled insults at me… They were poured on me like blood rain… She told me how stupid I was… Her hubby(that’s my hubby she’s reffering to as hers) has contacted her with another phone n begged her… Just then my hubby walked in… N I asked him… He denied it n said that that girl is a psycho n if I decide to listen to whatever she is telling me… Then I’m gonna hurt maself for no apparent reason… So I did let that slide…so this lady still calls me n insists that my hubby is hers n everyone in that town knows so… I became interested in knowing more… So when she asked to meet with me… I told her its OK… Since I wasn’t in town I gave her the date… Then we met one evening… My hubby kept on calling n I told him I had arrived n I was meeting with this chic in town.,he became furious… N came where we were at… When he arrived this lady had told me that she is HIV positive and that my hubby knows about it but he’s till been making out with her not using protection …when my hubby arrived… He just attacked this lady n started beating her up… Put me in a cab n joined me then we drove home… 2 weeks down the line… My hubby travels to go visit his dad… I was down with a bad cold… So he came back a bit early to attend to me… Then he went to get me meds … This lady calls me n tells me that that she is meeting with my hubby… I didn’t believe it… I asked her which hotel n room… She gave me the room number… I took a cab n rushed there…boom… I found them in the act…my hubby indeed was shagging her… I lost it… He knelt down n begged me there… But I couldn’t just talk… Went back home… Then started packing… He became mad and started beating me up… Till I passed out… Was rushed to the hospital and put on oxygen for four days… Then I got discharged after two weeks… All this time he was with me at the hospital… I went to my mum’s place but never told her anything… Later my hubby begged and I came back home… This time round we moved to another time… Never did I know that he was cheating on me still with different lady’s… He was lying to them on how he was to help them out financially… After three months… I found out about it… And at this time he had slept with 5 ladys… We fought… And I ended up in the hospital again… We reconciled then he took me for a valentine treat… The day after a message pops in his phone I saw it and we fought he travelled to see another lady that he had shagged…he spent there for two days… While to me he lied that he was at his friend’s place all that time…
So he had made a promise to this lady that he was gonna be a father to her son…coz this lady was way much older to him… All she wanted was a father figure to her son… I had an early morning flight to catch… Normally he keeps my ID for me in his wallet… So I searched for it thinking that he had left it behind… But I couldn’t find it… So I had to call him… While talking I could hear an echo… So issued him this early you in the loo… The he was like nope I’m in bed… But I knew so well that it wasn’t bed that he was in… So I used another form of Identification to fly with to my mum’s place then back home… Upon reaching home he wasn’t still there… He reached home very late in the evening… Then straight on I confronted him n told him that he was from that lady’s house… He denied it… Then I asked him to call the lady to confirm… He refused and instead opted to leave… He took his back pack n left… Minutes later he came back now ready to call the lady… Coz I know him so well… I told him upfront that I knew he had talked to the lady n asked her to tell me that he wasn’t at his place… True to my thoughts… That’s what he had done… So the lady tried to convince me with lies(remember she is desperate and is in of a father figure) I don’t know what happen… But the lady bursted n asked me if my hubby was around as in next to me at that moment… I told her yes… Then she asked me to put her on speaker… Which I did… Then she told my hubby that she was giving him an hour to tell me the truth else she is gonna tell me everything… So my hubby finally admitted that he was indeed at the lady’s place for two days… But he doesn’t love her and wouldn’t choose her of us his family… That he was sorry blah blah blah… We fought and I passed out.(reasons as to why I always pass out is one I have a breathing problem… I’m asthmatic… And he’d use that against me… He’d strangle/chock me till I’m breathless). He gave me a first aid and when I was abit stable he left to go get me a refreshment… On his way there he texted this lady begging her to forgive her and that that I had stabbed him… He was bleeding that the lady should unblock him on whatsapp they chat there… The lady just asked him to go to the vct with me n send her results… The next day I asked him to take me to the hospital…, my aim being to have a test… Less did I know that he also wanted that just to probe to the lady that he was clean., so after the test I saw him trying to take a pic… Anyway the lady ended things between them and I forgave him… I didn’t know that there were others still… So I had this infection that wouldn’t just go away… Never did I know that he is the one that infected me … And being that I was then one taking antibiotics and he wasn’t so he kept on reinfecting me… He contacted this infection from one of the gals… She was a student…(ION… He never spends his nights outside… Apart from those previous occasions… So suspecting that he was sleeping around was hard… He used to meet up with them in an hotel room during the day) so this student wanted to be rich very fast… Quick money… And my hubby lied to her that he was gonna help her achieve that… This girl was giving him cash whenever they’d meet( Mac you he used to take pics of them after making out(nude ones… I don’t know how gullible these chicks were)…how do you pose to a total stranger fully naked??? Note that all these women he hits on them in less than a week they are warming his hotel bed… And they are the ones paying for it…so when I found out about all these…another drama escalated… And as if its a ritual for him to always see me half lifeless… He did it again… So this time round I reported him to his dad… He sat us down,. Called some members of the family and he accepted that her had been cheating on me n battering me… He apologised and we walked home again as a husband and wife…we even moved places again… This time just the same town but different houses… We stayed together in peace for a a month… No fights no quarrelling… I guess its coz the pregnancy took a toll on me… All these time he hadn’t found a job… I was the one taking care of us… I had lost my job… So I was just borrowing money from here and there … From friends and ex colleagues… Sometimes my mum… So I knew my hubby had changed… I didn’t know I was wrong… I only came to find out about it after I had put to bed… I found out that the day I was being wheeled to theater my hubby slept with another lady… Then he came to the hospital the next day(sorry I skipped the part of waking up everyday at 3am to whisper a prayer till he got a job a month to my delivery)so now he had a job… An hour drive from where we stay… Yet he didn’t make it for his son’s delivery… My father inlaw and aunt were there for me though… Lemme summarise by saying that our son is barely two months old… And my hubby has cheated on me with 6 women
Now I feel like I’ve had enough… I feel like I’ve become too vulnerable… Too lenient… I just wanna end things between us … Hustle for a job and take care of our too kids… Coz even when I was only two weeks old post CS… He did beat me up,. I had to be restitched 3 stitches… Biggest problem is when he had messed out there he came and insisted that we make out …I guess he was trying to cover up… I was only 2wks gone… And now I’m pregnant… But the doc said I can’t carry the pregnancy coz my uterus is still weak… So I have to go for a DNC., our son is sickling a lot… He is already missing the first milestones… Our last fight was on Friday last week,… He was with another woman… And he made a fuss about it… Took the little boy from me and took to his dad… Instead of him calling me to ask what was going on… He blamed me for chasing his son out of our matrimonial home into the cold with our little son… When I went there… He treated me like a dog n even said I’m behaving like a dog… He pushed me out of his house n threaten to even come for The girl… He never bothered to ask nor hear my own side of the story… Anyway I told him I’m calling the police since I couldn’t let them separate me from my little boy… I mean who does that??? The boy is so young to be separated from his mother… Meanwhile my hubby had gone back to his work place… So I called him and he rang his father that’s when my father inlaw did release the baby to me… Since then my hubby hasn’t come home… We kinda separated but he still supports us… He send us money for upkeep and he wants us back(not sure of that)… My question is… What do I do… How do I go about all these… I feel crushed… Used betrayed and not appreciated… He has lowered my self esteem… Killed my ego and pride… I’m soo stressed… Help out… Since I can’t afford seeing a counsellor now… I thought of sharing with you beautiful people…
From Kilimani Mums
They maybe gullible, but even they don’t hold a candle to her when it comes to her grade1 foolishness.