[SIZE=7]He was accused of sexually assaulting an infant. He will spend four years in prison[/SIZE]
Andrew Glasser entered an ‘Alford plea,’ admitting a jury would find him guilty.
BISMARCK, N.D. — It’s pretty much like pleading guilty. A man accused of sexually assaulting an infant admitted there was enough evidence for a jury to find him guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. According to The Bismark Tribune, police first arrested Andrew Glasser in October 2017 for child abuse and child pornography. He pleaded guilty, after doctors said the baby girl suffered multiple rib fractures and broken leg bones over a period of time.
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Two weeks later, the Tribune reports Glasser was charged with gross sexual imposition. Prosecutors said he raped the infant he admitted to abusing. The now 33-year-old entered an Alford plea on Monday, apologized to “any victims affected by this” and asked the judge for leniency.
“I’m trying to get my life back after it stopped on a dime two years ago,” Glasser said, according to the Tribune.
Local news station KFYR reports he was sentenced to four years in prison and five years on probation.
This guy deserves something akin to the “three worst Chinese tortures” known to man, as narrated here.
A young man was wandering, lost, in a forest when he came upon a small house.
Knocking on the door he was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, gray beard.
“I’m lost,” said the man. “Can you put me up for the night?” “Certainly,” the Chinese man said, “but on one condition.
If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man.”
“OK,” said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house. Before dinner the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic figure. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she couldn’t keep her eyes off him during the meal. Remembering the old man’s warning he ignored her and went up to bed alone. But during the night he could bear it no longer and snuck into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn’t hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his room, exhausted but happy.
He woke to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read,
“Chinese Torture 1: Large rock on chest.” “Well, that’s pretty crappy,” he thought. “If that’s the best the old man can do then I don’t have much to worry about.” He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out. As he did so he noticed another note on it that read
“Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle.” In a panic he glanced down and saw the line that was already getting close to taut. Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder. As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read,
“Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bedpost.”