How Get Filthy Rich In Kenya

Now that this country has gone to the dogs, it is becoming very difficult to become filthy rich earning an honest living. The truth is most of the new money around town who exchange top-range vehicles like clothes are doing some shoddy business. After careful analysis, I present to you fellow villagers a list of some businesses you can venture in this country if you want to be successful. Makofi ya kilo tafadhali.

  1. Fake gold- See the evidence [ATTACH]237791[/ATTACH]
  2. Wash wash - I’m too lazy to explain
  3. The pimp game- I’m not talking about 200 bob lanyes but high-class hoes. Very profitable if you’re well connected.
  4. Pharmacy industry- This is a multi-billion industry. The only problem is the risk is too high.
  5. Extortion - I think every Kenyan has been extorted but the worst are the police and those working in KRA.
  6. Human trafficking - This is for the lowest scumbags who have no value for human life.
  7. Loan sharks- Something interesting about loan sharks is that they don’t want you to repay their debt. They just want your property at a throw-away price.
  8. Land fraud- Self-explanatory.
  9. Become a pastor- Another profitable business. People will trust you if you wear a nice suit and carry a bible while talking in a deep-toned voice.
  10. Busy-body- A lot of kungurus are in this category. Of course, kuna wale wa kuchunishwa sukuma.

P.S. I’m not involved in any of the aforementioned businesses, so please shove your stupid childish comments up your ass.

Next time msidanganywe na mtu akisema ati venye alianza biashara ya kuuza mandazi na investment ya 3k lakini saa hii anaiishi Karen. Most people are crooks like you wouldn’t believe. Of course, there are those making honest and clean money but those are the minority in Kenya and the government is taxing them even when taking a shit.

Import small items like Fa roll on and don’t pay tax, utakuwa na pesa kama mbwa.

Whats Fa roll.

It appears that most of them will land you in jail. This just confirms high risk=high reward. Nimekumbuka birrioneas wa kutengeneza makali fake who roll in high end cars. Hizo Jameson etc fake hukuwa na pesa sana or so it appears.

Willing to take the risk

Mtu anataka kuuza hasemangi willing to take risks…juu kwake hizo si risks just a formality…wewe endelea kuwa jobless


mand ogwal

The pimp game is less risky. Bora tu ukuwe pimp mwenye malanye wataogopa.

Another way ni through politics

Politics ni security ya ku solidify the above businesses

You can be all.