Help Needed

I don’t know how to put this, but at least I’ll be letting out ghosts out of the closet and my mind will be free after I’ve said the following. I’ve got a huge problemo, I DONT KNOW HOW TO APPROACH CHICKS. I even get very nervous when am around them, don’t mention getting laid, that’s like a nightmare to me, in fact the only pussies (dont know whether thats the right word to use) I’ve seen is only on a certain Telegram channel ran by @captainfrisk, that’s why after God, My Parents, then @captainfrisk follows in the most important list of beings I know, I respect him very much.

Okay,enough of the stories, this is where I need help. Apparently last year, 31/12/15, I got a chance of being laid, by some chick, am told she is my cousin, but she insists that am her uncle. So she invited me over, I arrived, didn’t want to let Mafisis down, but what happened next, I don’t know. You can imagine for yourselves, it being my first time, and then the claims that she is my relative, I was too anxious, she tried to bring me to the occasion by starting to undress, but the younger me couldn’t stand up, was sooooo scared, of many things. I was scared of pregnancy, taboos, and the stigma that I could face if my relatives came to learn of what I did. In the end, after her trying to get me out my clothes, we were just unsuccessful, she gave up, and told me to seek counseling.

FF this year, employed to this Mhindi, keeping records and calculating payroll, I got into a disagreement with the company’s foreman, also an Indian. So he decided to root for my removal, he with another dude, an African, they decided to bring another chiq to replace me,without the boss knowledge, but before they fired me, they asked me to teach the chiq they brought some few things that she didn’t know about this work. I saw that their meffiness had risen to astonishing levels, so I decided to contact the boss, told him to pay me my peanuts I dissapear from his camp. He was shocked, he hadn’t asked for any worker, he therefore warned the guys against doing such thing, but in the end the chiq just stayed, I started showing her how things are done. By the way, our camp is a male only camp, deep in Maasai Mara, so she was the only chiq in the camp, and I was the one who interacted with her daily directly, but being the shy guy I am, I sadly couldn’t even get close to even flirting, at long last she went away, guys are ridiculing me for being brought meat, but I couldn’t eat, at least not by my mouth.
FF to today, a Maasai watchman has brought his daughter to camp, and I’ve told him that I want to marry his daughter openly. So guys this is another chance that I won’t let go by, that’s why I wrote all the above to ask your help on how to lay her, I am not getting to 2017 without being laid, hell no!! The major reason why I wrote this is because I saw her today with another dude, you don’t wanna imagine the pain I felt.

Watu was matusi waanze kwanza kupost, alafu watu wa advice wafuate, help a nigga, and God bless you all

KULA managu kwanza boss …utapata nguvu ya ku approach mzoga thereafter

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Wanna help this virgin boy but before that, answer these questions.

  1. Do you look like a warthog?
  2. Do you know how to groom your self and look dapper?
  3. Do you stutter or have a hump?

I don’t look like a warthog, I look like a human
I spend 3/4 of my salary grooming myself
I don’t know what a stutter is, and I don’t have a hump

4.Do you emit any odour from your mouth or body,and can it be worked on

Good, watch the movie called hitch then watch 40 year old virgin. Join telegram groups and see all types of pussies. They are ugly as fuck FYI. Start flirting and fucking the ugliest and smelliest as you go up. Good luck.
P. S. Avoid fapping every minute you are alone

watu wa mentoring wakuje. here’s a chance to redeem yourselves…do something for future men!!

Oh boy:mad:

I don’t fap!!!:(:frowning:

ICPAK should de-register you for ashaming accountants…You only have 24 days to the end of the year. Kubali kuruka 2017 na your accomplice @Wakanyama na hizo dry spell zenyu.

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I haven’t complained of dry spell

you do not look like a warthog yet spend 3/4 of your salo on grooming yourself???


Unfortunately am not in the position to answer that

Huyu jamaa ni troll…do not feed him

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Troll ndo ni nini sasa??

He might be real acheni kuignore…

A stutter|stammer…

Oh I see, but I don’t stammer, in fact, am the opposite, talk tooo fast

Just try relax,and speak clearly,don’t rush,

Mwambie kuna kitu interesting unataka kumwonesha kwa nyumba…akikam funga mlango,whip out your dick na umchape chape nayo kwa uso,kutoka hapo ni smooth sailing

and that’s how you get laid

easy peasy


Vitu unaonaga kwa ngwati si real life budda

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