When I was young and energetic, topics like this used to really work me up. I have seen the Goodness of God. I thank God and glorify his name for the privilege of Life. I go to bed every night with the assumption that I will see tomorrow. he wakes me every morning. I waste my time planning my day each day, yet every activity goes as he has planned not as per my PLANS. Boss, God has put in Me comfort and joy. You with all your theory is just wasting calm time and talk to him, the truth will be revealed to you.
Ask yourself this question why did you come to THIS planet?. Imagine this millions of sperm your father generated yet you Just made it. Is it by coincidence?