Ghetto menu

Feel free to add on any new thing that has come up!

  1. Chapati dunga - this is where a chapati is rolled and pierced with a fork
    2.Chapati dondosa - this is where a chapati is served whole and served while floating on thick soup.
  2. Chapati msalaba - this is where a chapati is sliced into four equal quarters. The cuttings resemble a cross
  3. Chapati kifagio- this is where a chapati is sliced into many thin vertical strips
  4. Chapati chafua- this is where a chapati is sliced into many pieces as possible. Usually they are sliced into squares that are approximately 3.5 centimeteres squared (do the math)
  5. Chapati mbao/ chapati mawe - this is a dry chapati, those that break easily like a piece of wood
  6. Ugali saucer/ wembe/discount- that one i know you know ( wonder if it is still applicable with todays economy)
  7. Ugali mlima- this is an enourmous chunk of ugali served only to professionals and is usually served with a warning. ā€œukikosa kuimaliza, utaongeza kumiā€.
  8. Tumbukiza - this is where meat is overboiled until the meat is very soft. Usually served without salt. Tumbukiza special has no bones
  9. Kahawa kifo- so you have done kahawa chungu! This is worse. It usually contains lots of ā€œkahawa no 1ā€ and is overboiled till its black. its then served without sugar. Its literally burnt coffee
  10. Kaa ndani- this is where a mandazi is made an incision at the side and a delicacy inserted inside it. So kaa ndani ya sausage is a mandazi with a sausage in it.
  11. Jembe ya meno- toothpick
  12. Samaki cassette- this is fish which has bones in it. Its served whole whereby a person starts eating it on one side( side A ). Once done, its then turned to the other side (side B). A successful completed eating mission is certified once the only thing left on the plate are intact bones of the fish and the head.
  13. Karara- chapati nusu
  14. Combat- Githeri
  15. Mix/ missile / kadhalika- this is mchanganyiko of everything on the soup menu. Involves madondo, sukuma, nyama, ndengu etc. Na inasemwa na style, so dont go ati nipatie missile 20!It goes like "haya, hebu nibonde na chapo mix ya kau fourty, na ikuje chapchap kabla niachwe na ndege.
  16. Teargas- pilipili
  17. C.N.N…Chapati Na Ndengu
  18. U.S.A…Ugali Sukuma Avocado
  19. Chapati Marashi….Where chapo is passed over beef stew ndio inuke kama nyama
  20. Githeri Migingo…This is githeri that has just 1 potato at the middle
  21. ā€˜1.5 stage yote’ - that is one & a half chapatis, plus every form of stew made that day…ndengu, mboco,sukuma,ca
    bbage,nyamapiece tatu, soup etc etc

Stolen

19 Likes

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

CMB - Chapati Mbili Beans

Surwa- Chapo, mandazi zimekatwakatwa kwa stew ya beans, was a delicacy immediately after F4 @aviator kuja uchague kile unataka hapa

1 Like

No 20 &21…:D:D:D:D:D:D

1 Like

No wonder it was always a struggle..!

fuck u Some say

:D:D

Githeri tsunami - githeri with a lot of soup
Githeri lipuka - githeri iko na cabbage

1 Like

Mimi am almost asleep.

We had a date at 9.30. You chickened out. Huwes saidika.

Make me some pancakes.

2 Likes

siko Thika RD my.dear

I don’t do charity work.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

1 Like

Although I seen a version of this before,hiyo ya 1.5 Stage zote ni mpya kwangu…nice

hehehe…
sijawahi sikia githeri migingo

1 Like

:smiley: :smiley: :smiley: :smiley:

:D:D:D:D:D:D

Hio 16 ni noma.