Wacha niwaambie. Never go on a solo road trip with your psycho boyfriend.
Let me give you a breakdown of what a psycho boyfriend is, from my own personal experience. The worst feeling ever is when someone sees you as their possession instead of as an individual and an adult. They do not appreciate your individuality, they want you to change everything for them. So tragic.
- A guy who is isolating you from the world, he tells you that your friends are bad, he doesn’t want you socialising with other people especially of the opposite sex.
2)He wants to know where you are at all times.
3)When you are fed up with his wack behaviour and possessive nature and you want out, the guy becomes aggressive and suicidal. - He gets mad when you show signs of independence like taking trips with out him.
5)He becomes violent to other men if they talk to you
6)He is always suspecting you for cheating
7)The relationship feels like a trap
8)When you break up its OK for him to have a girlfriend but not you
9)Stalking and threats to harm you especially if you have a new love interest - Gifts galore when you put your foot down and decide to leave the relationship
To date I have never recovered. I’m hypervigilant about my personal space and freedom. When I see some possessiveness I panic. I am usually ready to drop the relationship like a hot potato when I get that feeling like someone being controlling. I am also the type of person who is never bothered by what you do when you are away from me. I have therefore been blamed for not being loving and concerned bcz love is defined by how possessive you are about someone to ensure that they do not cheat on you . If you are less bothered about what he is upto and don’t question him incessantly about his itinerary that is a sign that you are either cheating or you don’t care. First of all if you are not sleeping with someone I don’t know why it should be an issue if your partner wants to see other people bcz after all even if you are bf and gf, at the end of the day you are both still single and free to mingle bcz there’s no commitment you have made to be exclusive. You are just dating. Not becoming their father and mother. Independence ni muhimu and you only realise it when you are being suffocated by a psycho boyfriend who thinks that they own you bcz you enjoy their company and they done bought you a couple of gifts. It’s a bad feeling. Instead of having the time of your life, here you are feeling suffocated and trapped and wondering what you got your into. It’s another very toxic, very demonic feeling. It’s like you are trapped like a slave. It is the worst feeling ever. It’s exhausting. It’s absolutely the worst thing ever.
The worst part of having gone through this experience is that it makes you so sensitive to the point where if you just sense the slightest hint that a man is getting possesive or controlling you are like oh hell Naw I am not going through this psycho bullshit again. You become so defensive about your freedom. For example, you tell the person that you are getting ready to go to a kesha and then the next day he starts giving you a hard time about you being out at night. So the next time you go to the kesha, you don’t tell him about it, you just lie that you slept early. So basically you stop being open about your whereabouts. End of the problem. No conflict.
The good side of it is that you never bothered about what the other person is up to. Like the person can tell you that he is going out and you don’t even ask where, you go to bed and the next day the guy is expecting you to give him a hard time, grilling him about who he was with and what time he got home but you don’t. So he’s like kwani you are not bothered? I’m like I’m not your mother to be keeping tabs on you like you are a child.
Well the logic is pretty simple. You don’t need to be out at night to cheat. You can do it at 9am in the morning. You can’t escape taxes but you can escape psycho bfs if you spot them early enough. You can’t deal with all the stress in this country then you still have to deal with a shit boyfriend who is a thorn in your flesh.
Nywy here is the movie