"Friendship" with women

Am I the only guy who feels like friendship with women is transactional most of the time? It’s as if the whole “it’s a man’s job to provide” is no longer expected for you and your family, but for every woman around you. I feel like I have to be paying in some way shape or form in order to interact with women, in the form of buying lunch, doing some sort of physical labour, paying for their drinks, some woman even expect me to pay for their shopping in case we wind up in the supermarket together and I don’t understand why.

It’s not a case of me being unattractive and unable to get women coz I’ve slept with most of these women I’m talking about, but mostly as my way of getting something out of this “friendship” because otherwise they offer next to nothing, and bringing it up in a conversation with them & asking them to make more of a reciprocal effort just leads them to disliking me and eventually pulling away from me.

I feel like I’m being gaslit to act in a manner that just pleases women if I’m being honest and it’s just leading me to avoid them, or if I feel like I want/have to interact with them, I just view them as objects coz sex is the only thing of value to me that I can get from them. I can’t open up to them coz I can see them disinterested and turned off when I do so, I can’t expect calls from them to hangout where they’ve prepared a fun activity at their expense, it’ll usually be expected for me to pay, be it to buy a pizza and go to their place to hang out or to try out a restaurant or fun activity like ice skating etc.

And these aren’t broke women either, they’re educated and are making equal if not more money than me, which baffles me even more.

This might be something specific to me but it’s frustrating nonetheless, I’m open to some constructive feedback.

No insults please, those don’t help


The Vibes you give off at first contact with a woman determines how she will treat you onwards…so it means you give simping vibes and in return women use that against you
If you buy her attention, company, time, pussy tho indirectly a bitch will feel some type of way if now you wanna stop
So advice stick with women who arrange dates,start conversations on texts, call you just go with the ones who show effort


Nope, you didn’t understand my post, I definitely don’t simp. What I listed are women’s expectations, not things I actively do. And my frustration is that it’ with almost every woman you meet regardless of whether I want to bang her of if its a potential “friend”, expectations ziko tu for some reason…

At least if I fuck them I can tel myself I got something out of it, or so I tell myself, but otherwise it’s an obvious waste of my time. Plus ot all of them are fun to fuck anyway.

Nisahau story ya urafiki na wanawake ama?


You probably are a guy with an above average looks (6 out of 10) and you got your shit together and you expect women to fuck you with nothing in return! haziwork namna hio but clearly it shows none of these women have genuine desire for you.

Dem amekufeel huwa ako na a problem asking you directly for favours, you will even see it through her actions.

Non-transactional sex it comes through:

  1. Genuine Desire
  2. If a woman finds you sexually attractive but she already has a beta.
  3. If you are a broke nigga but the woman knows you got a good pipe.
  4. She finds you attractive but she knows you are stingy when it comes to your resources.
  5. If she is chasing for your validation.

You read all that and understood nothing. I’m interested in friendship, but they want things from me that aren’t typical of a friendship and do not reciprocate, hence me fucking them in order to get something out of me giving those things that they ask for/expect, or getting rid of them altogether.

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That’s what betas want, friendship with women, hello!!!


Well you are already getting pussy…So enjoy yourself si ati unatafuta bibi.
You said it yourself…sex is all they have to offer so drown in some pussy until you are ready to settle down

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Champe amesema he just wants to be friends with them, hataki kinembe na hataki hao madems to ask him for any favours, dunia gani huyu anaishi


If you meet women as a part of a large friend group, will you be fucking all of them or ignore all of them? Or am I being naive and should just use women how I see fit?

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Bro the only time you should consider being close friend with any woman is if she is in a position to help you secure the bag. Hawa wengine keep the conversation moderate.


Haha, fair enough…

Which kind of friendship are you talking about?there are only 2 transactional friendship with any woman

1.malaya;whom you will pay for a cum of juice
2.Business woman;whom she will make money for you and vice versa

You will never make any meaningful friendship with a girl apart from your girlfriend, alafu wenye uko nao wanakuona kama their next meal ticket


Women wa siku hizi are self centered and won’t hesitate to apply direct or passive manipulation. They usually brag about how many “errand boys” they have and the bullshit these boys do for them. This is the main reason I stopped being too friendly na madame wa church

Umesema you’re not sexually interested in them, nothing wrong with that. Some ladies, however will make you pay for their stuff and run their errands because they’ve detected your INABILITY TO SAY NO!


Kaka you have a lot to do to catch up. Elders hapa we are looking at some of the ways that can get women work for us and make us rich. Wewe bado uko chapter two ya how to attract women.


Usijali. One day you will grow up and learn that sex ain’t all its hyped up to be and that your money and time are more valuable. Only then will you stop dealing with females who don’t benefit you.

If I hang out with a woman who isn’t my relative, you can be certain that I’m either getting sex or money from her (customer/employee). My time isn’t free.


Sheria ni moja, lazima mtu arudishe mkono. Whether it’s a man or woman it doesn’t matter. I’ll pay the bills maybe twice or thrice, kama hamna kurudisha mkono, I cut you off kabisa. The only exception I make is when I know someone ain’t a stingy person but they’re going through a tough time. Hapo nitasimamia mtu till they get back on their feet. I hang out with guys sometimes and we split the bill equally. Unless on the rare occasion unafika unapata mzinga kwa meza naisha lipiwa, hapo unapimisha nyama watu wakule.

If we’re traveling for things like burials, etc and we’re using your car, we the non owners of the car should fuel for the trip na kama mtu hataki ku chip in achukue matatu. If you ain’t my father, brother or boyfriend why should I expect you to pay my way?

Nyinyi ndio mnazoesha wanawake vibaya.


Same question asked by every typical broke ass niggas everywhere. The solution is simple my guy, if you don’t want to spend, why don’t you go for CEOs or MDs or women with status? Oh my bad, you is broke I forgot. Tafuta pesa nugu ii.

I am in the same predicament as you. I am willing to bet that at the start of your friendship, you used to pay all bills because you are the man. Problem is the lady will get accustomed to it and that will be the norm. There’s this lady that I screw whom when we hang out, she has never paid a single cent for any bnb or drinks we take. Her pussy is the most fire I have ever fucked but it has reached a point that the benefits are now outweighed by the financial losses. Sleepover zetu zinakuanga twice a month and 20k disappears into thin air almost always. I am approaching 30 so this is no longer tenable. Huyu mi humuelewa juu she lost both her parents when she was young na ni 2nd born alafu yeye ndio ako stable so analisha na kulipia fees siblings wake 4 singlehandedly that’s why mi hulipa bila tashwishi. But still nimeamua tu nijiondoe. She has a very catchy personality so nitamfriend zone tu kidesign. Heri nilipe 150 sasa.

It’s such a stark contrast to my immediate ex. She had fallen head over heels for me so akanipea slices first then the following day she took me out on a date where she paid. We lived together for 5 years and she is the one who bought all the major stuff, TV, Fridge, Cooker plus alikua anabuy food yote. Nilibuy tu music system na PS. Yaani mi nilikua tu soft life. Mark you she was 3 years younger na salary zetu zilikua at par. On top of that she used to cook and clean. When we broke up, nyumba ilibaki empty I had to start afresh. Msichana alikua amenidedi mbaya but I guess its because I used to shaft her very well. Alikua dem mfity sana and I lost a gem but I hope she found a good guy who takes care of her the way she took care of me.

In short OP, unatumiwa vibaya na inafaa umee akili ujiondoe vile mi pia nimeamua.


Mmekataa kupea madame wenyu pesa mpaka wanatukuji sisi relatives

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Men and women can only be friends through circumstances like work, business or family bonds. Even in these cases, firm boundaries are necessary to prevent the man from being used as a wallet and an errand boy.