Embarrassed by a relative

Last weekend a relative of mine who we had stayed for sometime without meeting invited us to go and view a piece of land somewhere in katani. It was a slow Sato and since I did not have plans, I obliged.
So off we went, my wife and I, and met the dude at some place near mlolongo.
First thing I noticed, is that the dude had a new car.
" hey mboss, congrats! Naona umejikakamua’ I told him.
“Thanks, lakini hii yangu haiwezi fika huko kwa mawe, wacha tutumie yako” He responded.
I felt offended coz this feker is the one who knew where the plots were, and he was the one who invited us.
I hate this kind of exploitation. Lakini juu ni relative, nikakubali shingo upande.
Tulifika a place, njia ikaisha, literary but what made me even mad along the way was the way the dude was criticizing my car. Oh, badilisha shocks, oh sijui hii gali hukunywa sana oh mine is faster. You know that dick measuring contest.
After kufika dead end, i told them we walk. We walked for about 1km viewed the plots and went back to the car.
We then headed back to a place near mlolongo tukule kanyama.
Kumbe the nigga had invited us for a show off all along. He continued with his yapping about how he has money these days, blah blah, bluuh, blah.
“Infact these days sikunywangi lakini juu tuko na nyinyi wacha tuteremshe kanyama” He said.
"Wacha I pay for the meat, you buy a drink " He added.
I realized that I had not carried some enough money coz I only had 1k kwa mpesa.
“Sawa” I said. “Lakini mimi nitakunywa Maji coz am driving”
So I ordered for water, wife ordered for soda.
You know what the dude ordered? 750ml Viceroy!
As he drunk away, he would flush out his wallet to show vile ako na mullah. Mimi nanyamaza tu.
The bill for drinks came to around 1600.
What transpired after this left me with a bad taste in my mouth!
I thought wife had some money with her but unfortunately she didn’t.
I requested the dude to chip in 600 to refund later nikitoa kwa ATM.
He flatly refused!
Furthermore he left us there and carried with him what was left of the viceroy, and sped off!
His parting word: “mbona mnanuna pombe na mnajua Hamna pesa!? Mimi nishaalipa nyama na sikuitisha mchango!”

Embarrassed to the core, I had to leave wife as security and go to look for some money in some agency. (My bank is family bank)

Kweli maskini akipata matako hulia mbwata.
Up to now am trying to recall what I did to this nigga, to deserve this kind of treatment nakosa.
Anyway I moved on having learnt my lesson the hard way.

senji sana huyo jama

Shit this can’t be real :eek::eek::D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Sawa tuu lakini umetuchenga mahali. Wapi huko maji, soda na mzinga ya viceroy inauzwa 1600?

shait, pole kwa masaibu

Next time take an Mshwari, KCB mpesa loan. They give me upto 2500 combined na wamenitoa in tight spots on some occasions but that relative ni Mbwa sana.

ungejitoa the moment he started shitting…

Some class A hole that one:D:D

Plan a quick revenge. That’s the real shaitan. Don’t let him just walk away with that. Mfanyie kitu hutawahi/hatawahi sahau. Some relatives are the real “bishes” and should not be given a chance to embarrass you at any cost.

Pole sana. Anyway good riddance to bad rubbish.

Close shave that was, ungekosa bank ingebidi you auction off the wife :D:D

hio kimtu ni meffi. makwapa ya chura. he has a small dick

Anamekuwa akimezea wife mate:D

Revenge is highly recommended here. Just play not offended and wait for the perfect opportunity.

Hiyo ghasia ya mtu hafai tu kuachwa hivo scot free.


Leta breakdown ya hio bill Jeff mwangize .

that dude amekuwa emekuchukia from way back.

You deserve the treatment. …:D:D:D:D:D:D

The guy is a dick but ata wewe…mwanaume unatembea na 1000 kwa mfuko? Ata mobile banking hauna

Iza. @Keffjoinange . I find that even more embarassing mbele ya wife.


You must have a lot of faith to drive off from home with wifey with only 1K kwa mfuko going to a place you do not know. Then to top it off you suggest nyama mkule. Anyway funny story huyo jamaa ni jinga sana