ctrl c ctrl v
Nothing tops the Jolly Rancher story.
Steve and his girlfriend Samantha
went off to college in August. She
went to Florida State, he went to
Penn. So, she decides to fly to PA to
visit him. He was really happy to see
her so he decided to give her some oral
action.
He had done this numerous times
before and he always enjoyed doing
it…but for some reason, this time, she
smelled really horrible, and she tasted
even worse. He didn’t want to offend
her though because he hadn’t seen her
in months…so he put a Jolly Rancher in
his mouth to cover it up, even though it
didn’t do much to help.
In the course of eating her out, he
accidentally pushed the candy inside of
her… and stuck a finger in to grab it
out. He took it out, and put it back
into his mouth and bit it. Only…it
wasn’t the Jolly Rancher.
It was a nodule of gonorrhea.
As in, the blister-like structure that
gonorrhea makes filled with diseased
pus was the size of a fucking Jolly
Rancher and the poor guy BIT it. I
guess it was really dark in the room.
He freaked out and started vomiting
all over the place when it exploded in
his mouth…
He demanded to know what was going
on, turns out she had cheated on him
at a club like, the first week of college,
and fucked some random guy and the
stupid bitch had no clue what was
wrong with her. She noticed a strange
smell though.
So now, Steve is freaking out that he
now has gonorrhea of the mouth and
God knows what else.
