Domestic Violence a sign of a sick society that normalizes violence until tragedy strikes

Why this Stockholm syndrome? Why is it so hard to just leave abusive and toxic relationshits? Why do we romanticize struggle love? Remember during the funeral of Dr. Gakara and the kids he murdered their mother said, goodbye my sweetheart Dr Gaks. Madam your sweetheart Dr. Gaks injected your innocent children with insulin. Can you imagine what was going through their minds? They were probably crying for their mother. Nobody was condemning this act of brutality. Everybody was just making excuses for the cold blooded child killer, victim blaming the mother.

Guys, THERE IS NO JUSTIFICATION FOR KILLING AN INNOCENT CHILD. NONE WHATSOEVER.

NOT IF YOUR WIFE IS LEAVING, CHEATING, LIED TO YOU ABOUT THEIR PATERNITY.

Its now become a thing especially in Kenya if you have any disagreement with the father of your children, you better know where to hide your kids bcz killing children is now a dispute resolution mechanism for men in Kenya, if you are a single mom, he will kill your child that’s not his like the judge’s daughter and the boy buried in Mount Kenya to get back at you. If it’s their dad, he will kill them and kill himself, what can hurt you more than that, hapo amekupiga 100 nil. Mob justice. Extra judicial killings. Police brutality. What is wrong with our country? Why is life so cheap to us. Killing even children is now in the news every week. What the hell? If you read the comments here especially from men here, you wonder did this people have parents or they were raised by wolves, no iota of outrage for the poor children, no condemnation for the man bcz the beach made him do it. Nobody can drive you to do anything that isn’t in you to do, you are a psycho and in the moment of pressure the real ugly no good demon you came out to play. And everyone condoning and defending this madness is no different. Y’all are firked up psychos when you can’t hold a grown ass 54 yo man on his 2nd marriage accountable for killing INNOCENT CHILDREN. Instead you are defending his demonic actions. What is wrong with you people?

Anyway back to my point, guys can we teach our children, ourselves to not condone abuse in the name of love. Love doesn’t hurt, recently a woman put her boyfriend in suitcase and taunted him as he suffocated to death, recorded it on her phone and then she went to bed slept until 11am is when she called 911. In that toxic relationshit, the guy would cheat on her, choke her, she would bite him and scratch him and then in the end she killed him. Is this what love is surely?

If you are not happy with someone it’s very simple, just leave the damn relationshit already, don’t go out and cheat, don’t beat the person, kill them, kill the children, kill the dog, kill the neighbor who is coming to help. LEAVE DAMN IT. The whole point of being in a relationship with someone is happiness, sasa if you are miserable and you feel cheated and shortchanged and used why stay until your frustration drives you to kill? Nobody is holding a gun to your head. Vote with your feet.

I have people I thought were my friends for years and one day they showed me their true colors, I didn’t think about the years we’ve been friends or the good things they had done for me. I blocked them. I deleted them and I never looked back even when they tried to reach out to me. That is how radical I have become about protecting my well-being. Guys, WHEN PEOPLE SHOW YOU WHO THEY ARE BELIEVE THEM THE FIRST TIME. NOT THE 5TH OR 10TH TIME OR WHEN THEY ARE KILLING YOU OR YOUR CHILDREN.

Kwanzaa women our intuition tells us things are off even before the person’s mask starts slipping. The Freudian slip. We know when there’s something wrong before it even comes out. In the wild animals of prey or smaller, weaker animals have stronger instincts than Predators. They sense danger and start running before they even see the predator. This is why God gives women a 6th sense but we just wanna be agreeable, placate and be nice to people who don’t have good intentions for us. Justifying insane behavior ati he was abused as a child. Who wasn’t abused as a child? My mother forgot my birthday when I was a child, does that justify me stabbing my boyfriend or throwing knives at him or breaking his stuff when I am angry with him and I am not getting my way with him? Hell No. And then afterwards I will be like it’s because I love you so much I can’t live without you and I thought you were cheating on me so I lost it. I love you so much. I’m so sorry, lemme take you to hospital. Yah. This is the sick shit that people call love. It’s not love. It’s possession and plain insanity. You don’t own your partner. They can leave whenever they want. You don’t get to throw acid and hot water on your husband bcz you found photos or texts from women. You either accept that you are married to a philandering bastard or you throw him out. You don’t get to put steel wool or cow sedative or ground glass in his food. You don’t get to go to mganga wa tanga to reign him in and you are now screwing an old, smelly mganga on the regular so that you can keep a man. There’s no man who is worth this kind of crap and stooping to these levels for or going to jail over. You were OK before him and you can be better after him.

Guys let’s normalize leaving people who are not good for us behind no matter how long we’ve been with them, how much we love them bcz for sure attraction and love is unconditional, you can’t help who you love but if it’s not making your life any better normalize leaving him or her behind.

And I don’t say this because my mother taught me or I have just always had it figured out. I say it because a couple of times, life taught me the hard way the cost of not knowing any better bcz this is what society teaches women from childhood with those bullshit prince charming fairytale stories. We are brainwashed into seeing men as our saviors and our happily ever after. Madam, nobody will save you from anything, there’s no prince charming coming. You are your own best knightess in shining armor. Nobody will ever have your best interests at heart more than you. Deprogram from codependent social brainwashing. It will destroy your life.

Its so painful to watch bodycam of a terrified Gabby Petito on police body am after other people called the police bcz her fiance was abusing her and then he kills her, leaves her body out in the middle of nowhere like she’s a piece of garbage and gets in her van drives to his parents house and they all go camping as that poor baby’s body is lying in the middle of God knows where, maybe being eaten by wild animals like she was nothing.

Women this is how people treat us when we don’t value ourselves enough to say, I love me more than you or anyone and I am not taking your crap anymore. Goodbye. Kwaheri. I am worth more than this. I deserve better than this. I mean if you don’t love and value yourself enough to say no to abuse, he will just keep degrading you until he kills you and throws away your life less body like the trash you let him treat you as. We show people how to treat us. For a year Gabby lived with her fiancées family they did not value her then and they most certainly don’t value her now that she is been killed by their son. He would hit her in front of them and she would stay. She was saying Brian is soo important, he’s even more important and valuable to me than I am to myself. They agreed.

When I was a kid, my uncle married this girl who lived in our Sq. She was amazing. They had 2 kids. When the last born was 2,she found out that he was HIV positive. My uncle had infected her and the last born with HIV. When HIV was HIV and there were no drugs for it. She quit her job. She burnt his everything. She left the kids. She went to Mombasa to live with her sister. When he died of AIDS a few short years later she came back during his funeral and took her kids with her. Her boy died in his 20s of AIDS and she later died of cervical cancer. Please note that nobody was killed. Those who love justifying suicide and murder. The only remaining member of that family is the first born girl. She’s a nurse. I don’t know why I am telling you this story but my uncle who was very handsome loved his drink and his women. She loved him regardless. And this is how it ended. I bet if she could see the end she’d have left him immediately she realized what kind of a man he was. You can’t love someone into changing, if they are going down, it’s either you cut them off and never look back or they will take you down with them. Very simple.

Women, this is a man’s world. When you are an underdog you have to develop defense mechanisms and coping strategies on how you will protect yourself from harm. Like black people avoid getting into altercations with white cops bcz they are the underdog and their life isn’t as valuable as that of a white person. Is the same way you must learn not to put yourself in situations to be harmed by men. You are physically weaker, and you are likely not to be taken seriously or to get victim blamed by a male supremacist society when you end up as a victim the same way it happens to black folk in a white supremacist society. Take every precaution not to end up as a victim. People feel alot of things for victims but respect isn’t one of them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXWsFGg_6d0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox72KgHBWxY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCwl6AxkFUs

Thank you for this strong message. You have put everything so succinctly. So much wisdom

I like this and you because of such threads…so many truths we have to teach our daughters…big up