Do cats have a collective noun.

Weeeeche. Its that day of the year when you as a man, are required by the deities to count the cats that have hosted you over the years and to pay homage to the Venetian breed for all the joys (and miseries) that they brought your sorry Martian self.

Today, i am seated here after my usual rounds hawking fake tomato sauce, and my mind has acquired a mind of its own and went back to where it actually started. I was twelve and had somehow managed to convine two girls, one classmate and another in class five, to join me in a clump of bushes a short distance from the communal water spot one sunny sunday afternoon. They came along with their water mitungis and for a while, we spent time chasing each other around and eating wild fruit. As time progressed, the chasing around became more intense coupled with voluntary and involuntary falls. Then i got to asking for it inbetween laughter and deflected blows on my hand that never ceased to stray towards a chest or a butt.
They didnt seem to mind my probing much and it was like they enjoyed the occasional touching. As time crept on, we got serious and experimented on kissing. I would kiss this one, and then turn and kiss the other.
My begging for the cat never stopping, i feigned anger that both were bad girls for denying me. I walked away in anger to another bush a few meters away. Mainly i walked awat to hide the huge wood. They must have discussed the issue coz one of them picked the mitungis and went to draw water leaving the other behind. She walked slowly to my bush and i had my first attempt at deflowering a gal. I failed miserably.
Two years later, in class eight, i was an expert in the art. I have had my fair share of climbs thanks to Amadioha. I have had them big, and some short. I have slept them tall and short too. I have been with the darkest and i have had the whitest meat available. Twice, almost thrice, i have unknowingly climbed mad womwn who were on medication. The third one ripuka_ad before the chania bus reached Makindu.
Of the lot, less than 1% were whores. I remember my first poko, i was in form two second term at a place called MaFour back in the slopes . A friend paid her for my preasure. What i recall most is that she had a terrible toothache when we entered the room but that didnt stop my drive to nail her. Todate i cant tell for certain whether the grimacing and yelps were of my vigour or the rigours of the tooth. Back then we hit pokos dry fry since it was considered an insult to a gal to wear rubber. Infact i remember one in Dandora a few years later asking me “unanivalia kodom kwani mi ni malaya” . And i was like…duh…i just paid you wanu fiftee…
Growing up i didnt thirst much. I had my first twosome in form two, though it was never intended and i didnt think it was a big deal. My gal came in tow of her friend who was also my friend. The friend sat at the furthest corner of the single roomed cube pretending to be asleep while my gal and i made muffled groans behind the bed sheet curtain. Afterwards, she joined us in bed to sleep. An hour or two later, my gal was asleep but the friend was busy scratching the soles of my feet. I jumped on her and she didnt resist. Midway, my gal woke up but i was too intensely engrossed to stop. There was alot of fussing and threatening to go home in that ungodly hour but i managed to cool down tempers and climb her again to cement the treaty. But it didnt stoo there. Ifact it became the norm whenever they came together.

House girls i started climbing early. For long i ignored them, till one Friday afternoon when i qent home for Activity fees. My mom was away at work and my youngest bro was asleep in his cot. I just found myself on the little baganda gal pumping away. After that , i entered the race with my elder brothers whenever a new mboch was hired.
Secretaries, messangers, workmates and next office paralegals and paramedics and parawhatevers have been under me.
I have had them very quiet in bed, some very vocal, and two or six have screamed worse than jews in a German gas chamber. Some would never remove the skirt while some didnt need much propt to be nude. Quite a good number, especially in my younger days, would never do it with lights on. In my thirties, the trend changed and they needed light .

I have cupped every imaginable boob and held in my hands every documented butt size on offer. I have finished my business on sight of the grail and i have lasted over one and a half hours atop a gal before cum town. But trainning myself to last longer than ten minutes was not easy. I mastered it in college. It wasnt easy and i had often rush to the bathroom, soap in hand to get rid of the front runners and level the playing field just before a lady friend came in for a climb.
Luckily, daterape was not a crime when during my formarive years. It was merely frowned upon.
Less than twenty or so were hit and runs but i mostly girlfriended one for continued climbs.
I have had women , three to be precise, become imposibble to penetrate even after climbing them severalary prior. I have had a gal faint on me in form three and she freaked me out like what is this. I had to pour a whole bucket of water on her in the bed before she came back. I have had them in five star hotels, on dingy lodingings, in bushes, one leg on barbed wire fence, in the office, backseat of cars and in every acailable place. Once in my first spoon, it was under a maize store. Hehe.
Some brought me luck and many misseries, and yet brought me bad luck. Once after a steamy night climb, i missed being crushed by a kenya bus by a whisker. Another climb saw me dragged by a bus for almost twenty meters after kundandia the Stagecouch busses. A tram nearly flattened me someplace after a session in a brothel.
Financial and or business obligations have been written off by parted legs. I have had quite a number of them bid me stay put after cumtown as they did kegel on the hardened wood. Some have chased me off the cat after realising that the little chaps now racing up the cervix cant be recalled. My chest have pillowed some of the finest .
Some were vert petty, most were average janes, less than ten were terrible lookers and one, pliz forgive i, one was horid in looks.

Fond memories
The Mabenda lineage is live.

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Nitarudi kusoma comments after news.

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:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

very good read

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[ATTACH=full]22802[/ATTACH]

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He he he I have a feeling you really tried to shorten this hekaya. One day give us the detailed version of these events. All the same, hurts off bro.

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You think grammar is a MOTHERFUCKING joke?

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Hehehe…this stuff is for legends pewa Guinness mbili na Jeff alipe.

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one leg on barbed wire!?.. the legend that is mabenda!

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Ntasoma kesho.

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That mileage is too long. What’s your ingredients? Mukhobero?

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lost count after 20 cats, one question Sir, are you retired from cats or you are still game?

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more like gluing it together, ha!

applause bro…

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Nice one, u must have been a climber

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wapi ile machine gun ya likes

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Nice one Mabenda! You never disappoint.
I guess hii ni summary (really shortened), waiting for the formative bits(hekayas).

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Huyu kijana ni mtu ajab!..

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this is where one kawambui aka muthi…nugu aka @Carbon takes it up from you

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Kizungu ya @mabenda4 nikama ilibebwa na El Nino.

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i climbed till it is fun no more.
the cats look the same and seem to meow the same.

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i thought climbing mad women was the height of madness and i was the only one too mad to dare.
nimeona tuko wengi.
i remember one chiqita whose father watched with a hawks eye and followed her everywhere.
i hatched a plan to eat her cat in their own compound while his father was just a stone throw away.
she was to move her utensil washing spot to the fence,hang a torn bedsheet (this was where the weapon of mass creation will pass) on the mesh wire. then bend over knickerless and sing all the gospel songs she knew at the top of her voice.
i have never felt so good as when i came deep inside her and knew that i had beaten her old man on his own backyard

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