Wadinyane hii story iishe
Hatulipi!!!
SUNDAY NATION is where the UDA Shareholders Kickboxing Olympics is.
It started with Athi Water Services CEO Michael Thuita blowing the whistle that someone within the Ministry of Water had diverted Sh1.1 billion allocated for water projects in Muranga and Kiambu to other counties, without his knowledge and authority.
Water PS Kiprono Rono, upon hearing that he was the one being accused of denying Muranga and Kiambu Counties money meant for their mega dams, called the Athi Water Services Board Chair and asked him to convene an urgent meeting to discuss how they could assign the CEO lighter duties for exposing him in bad light.
Michael Thuita, upon hearing that the Board was about to meet to threaten him with those three options if he decided to stay put in office, frantically called Minister Alice Wahome asking her to kindly read the Bible verse that talks about Daniel being in the den of lions, although he did not mention who the lions were, and why they wanted to lick him up before taking turns at chewing his neck cacamoniously.
And just when Athi Water Services Board members had trooped into their Kiambu Road offices to handle kick Thuita like a Kano rice thief, Water Minister Alice Wahome picked her phone up, called the Board chair and asked him since when he started taking instructions from her juniors in the Ministry without consulting her.
The Board Chair, upon remembering how Alice Wahome once beat an IEBC officer like a Roho Fweny drum, mumbled a few words saying hata hakuwa na ubaya haki. And just like that, all the Board members who had gathered to send the CEO home were told there was no meeting and they should go back home to their families.
But if the Minister thought that her word had become law and that his PS was going to step on that story there, she had thought wrong.
The baffled PS, still furious that some UDA shareholders were already punching above their weight, logged into his email, typed furious letters to the EACC asking why the Minister would collude with corruption cartels to sabotage his work and copied the emails to State House for good measure, just to remind the Minister who is the real shareholders in the Ministry.
But Alice Wahome, refusing to be intimidated by the mention of State House in the email correspondences portraying her in bad oight, decided to step on the clutch pedal, and could be heard telling everyone in the office that if it is bad it is bad.
Enter the dragon, exit the tiger.
Kagumo MP Joseph Munyoro and his Gatanga counterpart Edward Muriu, both UDA shareholders from Alice Wahome’s home county of Muranga, called for a press conference giving the PS an ultimatum to return the Sh1.1B project funds that were diverted out of Muranga, or they would make some noise in court until the Ministry is reminded why they should not think Mt Kenya people can be hoodwinked with rice and beef stew only.
The Mt Kenya press conference was followed by a tough-talking Alice Wahome, who warned PS Rono that if he doesn’t stop copying internal memos to other parties without her consent, he will know why Gachagua wakes up at 4am to yawn in the dark before the last of Homa Bay night runner rides his exhaling hippo back to the waving lake.
Halftime scores at the UDA Shareholders Stadium along Hatupangwingwi Road:
Kongoi FC 2-1 Tugege Wanderers.
Courtesy Gabriel Oguda
Very funny stuff. 
hiyo ni vita ya shareholders. Unlike kuzimia beggers salivating for a piece of the pie from outside
Very soon watu ya mlima watajua hawana shares hapo. Izo “shares” zao zimekuwa diluted mpaka hawana say yoyote. Watu ya mikono wako na more power than hao figureheads wao
The poor citizens from those areas are the ones crying loudest hata unashangaa hio share kwani hawaipati!
Ruto second term will be bare knuckle.
That rabble huwa na shida kubwa sana juu wao hufinywa na wanapigia makofi wanaowafinya. It’s the lack of self-reflection that really irritates me.